A mom writes in asking for advice. Her husband recently went out to a haunted house with another female and is feeling jealous. He supposedly went with her and her three kids but left his wife and kids at home. The wife has never met this female although he considers her like a sister. This mom wonders if she has a right to be upset and jealous or if it is okay. Any advice for this mom?
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A member of the community asks:
“I need some advice, and I apologize in advance for the long post. With that being said, I need to know whether I am jealous or crazy or if my feelings are valid. My husband and I have been married for seven years this past April. We have two children together, and each of us has one other child from the previous relationship. Our youngest child is four months old. He is a wonderful father and provider for the kids. Ever since I was a child, I have battled depression. I also have anxiety and PTSD. I am taking Zoloft daily, but it’s not seeming to help.
Tonight my husband asked me if he could go out with a friend of his who was a female and her three children to a haunted house. She came and picked him up from our house paid for him to go and brought him back home. He has known this female since before him and I have got together. He has always referred to her as a sister. But about two weeks ago, this same certain female posted a picture on Facebook, and while he was scrolling through Facebook, he stopped on her photo and said she is way too pretty.
My Zoloft is not helping me here lately. I’m working on getting that fixed. I don’t really know this female that he went out with. No, they have never slept together. No, I was not invited. I stayed at home with the kids. I just didn’t want to feel controlling in telling him he can’t go. But now as soon as he got back home, he is asleep in bed and has barely said two words to me. Am I crazy? I feel jealous and sad that he went out with another female and came home and instantly fell asleep and did not acknowledge me.”
Community Advice for This Jealous Mom
To see what advice the Mamas Uncut Facebook community has for this mom in need, read the comments of the post embedded below.
Everyone was very supportive of the OP. Commenters felt she had every right to feel jealous after her husband went out with another female. Many shared the importance of communicating her feelings with him. One said, “Tell him how you feel. Communicate with him. It’s okay to be jealous but not trusting him is no good! If they are close, why have you not met her?” Another said, “I definitely wouldn’t allow that in my house. He basically went on a date with another woman and her family.”
Others shared similar feelings. One commented, “My husband has female friends he works with and knows and wouldn’t go out like that because he respects me and our marriage. Please sit him down, tell him it makes you uncomfortable and you’d like to meet her. If he’s friends with her the way he says, then invite her over to the house for dinner or all of you can do something together.” Another agreed by saying, “I’d be expressing how I felt about it and asking how he would feel if the roles were reversed and some guy took you out with his kids while your husband stayed home.”
Another commenter gave her really good advice in regards to her husband going out with another female and her being jealous. She said, “Always follow your gut instinct. Question him as to why he didn’t take his kids to bond. If it’s a “sister” like relationship then why couldn’t you have gone? Sounds very dodgy to me. Sounds to me like he has 2 separate lifestyles. You are dead right to feel the way you do because I would feel that way too.” One commenter had a similar experience. She shared, “My fiancé has several female friends and I have gotten jealous before about it, but I really try not to because he has assured me several times it’s nothing to be worried about. I still struggle with it when my anxiety kicks in and it can be really tough.”
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