A mom wrote in to Reddit’s popular “Am I the A**hole?” subforum about an unusual request she received from her mom and sister. While babysitting her nephew, she was asked if she would mind breastfeeding him.
Unbeknownst to the Original Poster (OP), her sister, who had left the house to attend her husband’s holiday party, and their mom had discussed that breastfeeding the three-month-old baby would be a great alternative if he didn’t end up taking the bottle.
Mom’s family pressures her to breastfeed her nephew.
However, the OP was uncomfortable with that. She wrote that she had a one-month-old at home who was born at six pounds and felt that “the milk I make is solely for my newborn.” Her mom kept asking her to breastfeed her nephew, but she held her ground and said no.
“I felt I was getting guilt-tripped and that I should’ve fed my nephew, but also felt that it wasn’t my responsibility,” she wrote. “My sister chose to go to a holiday party instead of stay home and tend and care to her 3-month-old.”
Most of the Reddit community readily agreed that she was not an a**hole for not wanting to breastfeed her nephew.
“It’s your boobs, your milk,” one commenter wrote. “But it’s so weird how they decided unilaterally that you were gonna nurse him without talking to you first.”
“If she was going to leave her baby for an extended period of time, she should have prepared him for it,” another commenter wrote.
Some, though, noted that while it was important to discuss the whole situation with her sister, it wasn’t the poor baby’s fault and he didn’t need to go hungry.
“Your nephew isn’t at fault,” someone said. “Hunger is literally painful for babies this young, and if you had the option to help – even if you were put into this position against your will – your nephew shouldn’t have suffered the consequences. You should have at least demanded that your sister be called back to feed her child.”
The original poster followed up to say that she had once told her sister that she would never breastfeed another child. “It’s just a weird thing for me,” she wrote.
Read this mom’s AITA post in full below.
The title isn’t what it seems to begin with. My sister had tested out how he would do with a bottle, and she only tested it once, last month. He took it that one time. So I get to my moms and she’s babysitting my 3 month old nephew. My sister decided to go to her husband’s SpaceX holiday party 1 hour away from home. What I didn’t know is that my mom and sister discussed between themselves that if he didn’t take the bottle I would be there to nurse him if I had to. So time comes for him to eat, my mom gets his bottle ready, he isnt having it. She looks at me and says “poor baby, you should nurse your nephew.” I replied with I’m not comfortable doing that. After that she continued to ask me to nurse him 4 more times each time me responding back with no. Also, I have a one month old who was born at 6 lbs so I felt that the milk I make is solely for my newborn. I felt I was getting guilt tripped and that I should’ve fed my nephew but also felt that it wasn’t my responsibility. My sister chose to go to a holiday party instead of stay home and tend and care to her 3 month old. Sorry if this is all over the place, it’s my first time posting and I’m still getting used to reddit. So AITA for not wanting to nurse my nephew?– Reddit
In case it wasn’t clear: We’re firmly Team OP on this one! That is the kind of request that should never be made, and if it is made of a mom, her response needs to be immediately respected.
When I’m not hanging out with my three-year-old and husband in Brooklyn, I’m busy writing stories for Mamas Uncut and managing PR + Marketing for Magnolia Bakery, based in New York City. On weekends, you can usually find me at a local park or playground pushing my daughter on the swings, “researching” the best almond croissants in Park Slope or launching into impromptu family dance parties at home, the sidewalk or, every once in awhile, a restaurant bathroom. I’m still trying to master the whole parenting thing, but I have learned that copious amounts of coffee, humor and humility are involved on a daily basis.
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