My husband constantly goes through my things and accuses me of cheating: I need advice

My husband and I have been together for 8 years now, and we have kids together. We haven’t had the best relationship; we have split up here and there. The last time we split up, it was because I’ve had enough of his controlling ways. Its always been his way or no way. Well, he is an ex-addict. When we split up, he begged me to take him back, and I wouldn’t do it, so he used to ease the pain he said. That was the first time I have ever left him, all the other times he would leave me for someone else or bc he wanted to party and have fun. We got back together in Dec. Ever since he came back, he hasn’t been the same. He is extremely paranoid; he thinks everyone is trying to set him up and puts him in jail. He thinks I’m in on it too! He will not sleep in the same room as me because he thinks I have cameras set up to watch him. He goes through every receipt I have to try and find something. He will even go as far as to question the kids and ask them what I’ve been doing, or if I’ve had anyone in the house. He goes through my phone, my purse, the car. He even put a recorder in my room to see if I was talking to anyone. He has lost all his friends due to his actions bc he’s even gone as far as to accuse his friends of setting him up and just talking crazy. His friends told me to leave him before he gets worse, and even told me he has been cheating. But he denies ever cheating. He just says I’m the one creating this and that. He just started a couple of months ago, drinking every day all this time. He says really harsh things to hurt me, and most of them are racist things. We are about to have another baby soon, and he cares nothing about this baby as he says it’s not his. We will be sitting in the same room, and he will tell one of the kids to ask me something when I can clearly hear him. He will not go get any kind of help due to the fact that he thinks he is not crazy about being set up or anything. I need advice on how to get him help if his not willing.

1,054 thoughts on “My husband constantly goes through my things and accuses me of cheating: I need advice”

  1. He’s probably cheating. Or worse he’s been hurt in the past and he hasn’t gotten over it. Talk to him. I mean really talk to him. And maybe you should see if theres a reason for you to be concerned about his behavior like maybe a guilty conscience.

  2. Honestly, If he can’t accept he has a problem there is nothing you can do. Unless he accepts it you’re stuck. Give him an ultimatum, he gets help or you leave. You will be ok, your children are growing up in an unhealthy environment and will grow up thinking it’s ok

  3. Run! This is not ok. My soon-to-be-ex husband was the same way, and all the while he was cheating. He controlled every aspect of my life, until I even began to question myself. It’s not safe mentally or emotionally.

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