A mom writes in asking for advice after she kicked her boyfriend out and ended things with him after her toddler told her that he hit him on his upper thigh. Now the mom is looking for advice from other moms who have been in a similar situation.
A member of the community asks:
“I have been in a relationship with someone for two years now. I haven’t been feeling well so I’ve been resting a lot this weekend. My toddler just came up to me and said, ‘Matt’ is being mean to me, he smacked me.’ I asked him, ‘where did he smack you?’ And he shows me on his upper thigh. So long story short, I asked [my boyfriend] if he smacked him, he denied it. He admitted that he told him he would smack him but didn’t follow through with it. I called my toddler into the room, and with the saddest face, he again said, ‘Matt’ smacked me right here.’
My boyfriend sat there and looked surprised. I told him he had to go, and I have to believe my children, and I ended it with him. As he was leaving, my toddler starts begging him not to go and after he closes the front door my toddler starts crying, saying ‘I want to give him a hug mommy’ and asked me ‘why does he have to go, mommy?’ I said ‘because he has to, baby.’ So I’m filled with emotions of anger, frustration, and confusion.
I have seen too many news reports on boyfriends abusing their girlfriend’s children or worse, killing them. Please anyone that’s gone through something similar gives me advice? I immediately jumped into mama bear mode and kicked him out. I tried googling some things, and a lot of stuff came up about toddlers lying about people hitting them. So that confused me even more. I know I did the right thing, but my blood is boiling at the thought of him hitting my child. Even a light smack is infuriating.
We’ve discussed that he will not discipline my kids ever. My toddler is rambunctious and gets on people’s nerves, but he does not deserve to be smacked, especially by someone we’ve established wouldn’t punish him at all. I feel so confused. Also, he’s never been abusive towards us. He has no children, so my fear is he is less tolerable with them. But I still can’t take what my toddler told me lightly.”
Community Advice for This Mom Whose Toddler Son Said Her Boyfriend Hit Him
To see what advice the Mamas Uncut Facebook community has for this mom in need, read the comments of the post embedded below.
One commenter wrote, “If he’s your boyfriend and already threatening to smack your baby imagine what it’ll be like when he thinks he’s this child’s ‘parent.’ No. You did right.”
While another person said, “I was gonna try to put my 2 cents in but it seems like nobody here believes in a pop on the leg when it comes to discipline. Or any discipline at all for that matter. So I hope you made the right decision but if your kid figures out all he has to do is say that to get rid of someone, he’ll abuse it.”
And one other community member shared, “Your baby comes first .. he shouldn’t hit him or even threaten to hit him.”
Do you have any advice for this mom? Leave a comment to help another mom out!
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