Question

These are questions asked by our Facebook Fan Page community directly on the MamasUncut Fan Page.

I am unhappy in my relationship: Advice?

My bf and I have been together for 14 years now, and I’m starting to feel really unhappy. Well, I’ve been unhappy for a long time, but I stay for my children because I want them to be around there, dad. He works the night shift and sleeps all day, which makes it difficult for the kids and me. He could go to bed a few hours after he gets home, but he would rather stay up and play video games until early morning and then sleep until an hour bf he goes to work. I have to beg him for attention and still don’t get it most of the time. I feel like he buys the kids love instead of spending quality time with them. But they adore him, and I don’t want to break my family up. I’m drowning in misery. I like doing things like vacationing and going to parks. Maybe take walks together as a family, and anytime I want him to join, it’s a big fight even to get him to go, and he ruins the mood. I feel like all he wants to do is play those damn video games. All he does on …

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My sons dad constantly talks bad about me to our son: Advice?

My 12-year-old lives with his dad by his own choice his dad talks bad about me to him my son seems to act like his dad when we got divorced we put 50/50 custody so what do I do my don’t want to come over because his dad hates my husband of 2 years, so he brainwashes my son he tells me he’s old enough to say where he wants to go he has always used my son against me in fights he would plan a vacation with his current family them ask me for a 100 or more for my son what should I do I hate him I hate that he puts my son in the middle of adult business Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

My husband planned a date night and included our kids: Thoughts?

Yesterday I told my husband I really needed a date night and we were GOING to HAVE to have someone watch the kids overnight. (I just had a baby a month 1/2 ago, and I have a 2,9) Today he suggests that after his meeting at work, I am to go with him on a mandatory date. Which was a surprise that I was super happy about, but then I realized and asked: “what about the kids?”. He said, “They’re coming too. We have to learn to take them with us anyway. Don’t we?” This is where I got upset. I understand we have to learn to bring the kids everywhere. But I specifically said, “we will need a babysitter for all night.” This is for my own sanity. Mom shames me if you must, but I know I’m a damn good mom. I just need a night to drink, cry, and be alone for once. I’m under so much family stress, and I need some self-healing. I’m not upset at this sweet, sweet attempt to take me on a date, but how do I tell him I’m at my wit’s end and in desperate need to drink without the …

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How long did you wait to get intimate after giving birth?

I am 3 weeks postpartum and just wondering when you waited to have sex with your partner again? I know they say wait six weeks or until your PP checkup for your doctor to give the thumbs up, but it’s been a while lol we stopped having sex my 8th month of pregnancy due to it being uncomfortable. So ladies, how long did you wait? Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

I found out my boyfriend never divorced his ex; Thoughts?

My boyfriend and I have been together for years. When we first started dating, he made it clear that he did not want any more children or to be married again. I was the opposite; I wanted a lot of kids and to be married. Over the years, things changed, and we have been blessed with three beautiful children. We have discussed marriage, and he and I have agreed to how we want our wedding to go. The thing is, he always comes up with excuses to back out of it and says I am pushing the subject. I have given him space, haven’t asked, and came to the fact that we are happy without marriage. I just found out a couple of days ago; there is no record of him getting a divorce from his first wife. (Please, don’t attack me on this, I took his word, and I already feel stupid) He and his 1st wife have not communicated for over 15 years, and she lives with her new family on the other side of the country. I just don’t know with this information, how to feel I guess….any KIND positive advice/ words would be great! Thanks. Anonymous …

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My SO hasn’t been very supportive during my pregnancy: Advice?

I am in my third trimester, and my SO hasn’t been very supportive through this pregnancy. Anytime I talk about how I feel, he automatically puts me down and tells me that I’m dramatic. The other night he called me the C-word, and that I was the worst thing that has ever happened to him. And all I tried to do was explain to him how I was feeling, but anytime I try he becomes irate and cannot hold a civil conversation. Should I leave now, or wait it out? He told me if I left, he would never have anything to do with me or our child. Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

My almost 4 year old fights me on potty training: Advice?

I have an almost 4yr old son (birthday in April) that fights me on using the potty. He will go poop on the potty, but when it comes to going pee, he will fight and fight. Some days are better where there is only one accident. But most days, he will fight me. I’ve tried potty training books, stickers on a poster as a reward, favorite candy as a treat, specials, etc. I don’t want to use discipline as a way to get him to use the potty; I don’t want to potty train that way. But I’m getting to my wit’s end with constantly having to deal with him peeing his underwear. I’ve been trying to potty train him for months. I’m trying to find new ideas or see what some of you guys have done for kids that were difficult to potty train. Thank you! Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

What would happen if I called an ambulance?

What would happen if I called an ambulance because I’m in an incredible amount of pain, and it’s just my kids and me?? I’ve been having horrible stomach pain since Monday and don’t have a way to get to the urgent care or er. My husband is always too busy, and I don’t have anyone else that can take me. I just would like info from anyone that might know what happens when a parent needs to go to the hospital in an ambulance, and there is nobody to watch the children. Will they bring the kids with me or find child care for them?? None of the family can watch them cause they’re all at work and don’t want to take off. Tia Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

What can I do for severe morning sickness?

I am currently ten weeks pregnant and have been sick for around five weeks. My doctor tried Zofran, and it didn’t even touch it. I was then out on Diclegis, which helped for a few weeks, but now I’m back to being sick and hardly being able to eat. Any tips? * I’ve tried B6, sea bands, and preggie pops Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

I am feeling burnt out with parenting: Am I expecting too much?

My husband and I have three children (ages 14,12,10) Our 12-year-old is moderate/severe on the autism spectrum. I am burnt out. My husband and other two kids see it and seem to really sympathize with how draining it is some days. My husband wants me to take a step back and stop doing so much for our ten and 14-year-olds because they should not need my help with everything anymore. I also really need to lighten the load, but IF the kids do what they’re supposed to do, they don’t do it how they know it’s suppose to be done. So I either have to do it again, or I have a giant mess to clean. Them “doing it themselves” means there’s going to be food all over the counters from them making their own dinner plates. It means the bread not tied shut, there’s a puddle on the bathroom floor, anything dropped will never be picked up, and they won’t even do their very basic chores unless I tell them to. Did I mention I’m burnt out? My husband says, “Don’t say anything. Wait till I get home and I’ll talk to them.” Nothing changes. I’m so sick of …

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My 13-year-old daughter refuses to sleep in her room: Advice?

I can’t get my 13-year-old daughter to sleep in her room she will only sleep on my couch in the living room I’m at my wit’s end, and when I ask her why she always says it’s too hot or she doesn’t like sleeping in there I keep my house at 71 degrees, and I have no clue what could be causing it. I thought it would be just a phase but if not she will not sleep in her room alone but when she has friends over they sleep in there do you think I should have her checked for separation anxiety or does anyone else have this issue Any help would be appreciated. Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

I am usure on keeping my daughter in daycare of using someone else: Thoughts?

Can you post this question Anonymously please. What would you do if your child is at a daycare that is amazing but it’s just too far and too much. There’s someone closer and cheaper that can watch the child, but you don’t know if she can be reliable. I’ve know her last year, she wasn’t that great, but I’ve heard from people that she has really improved in the last few months. What would you do, swap him to the new one or keep him where he’s at?? Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

Where can I find these items for a gender reveal?

Hi!! Did anyone purchase powder cannon tubes, or “smoke bombs” for a gender reveal party?! If so, where did you get them? I found some on Amazon, but the reviews are saying the smoke only lasted 5 seconds, and it was a very light color/hard to see. Also, any other gender reveals ideas that would be appreciated!! Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

Do I have a right to be upset?

Let me know if I’m wrong for being hurt and upset by my husband’s decision. I just had my nasal polyp removed early this afternoon. I was starving when we got back to our hotel and was looking forward to eating. I was given guidelines not to bend over, not to lift anything over 5 pounds. I have my sister and 3 years old here. I suggested we should order in for supper. But it turned out he had already made plans with his brother, who apparently gets really hungry after his dialysis. He’s been in dialysis for a few months. I wouldn’t ha e minded if he chose to have supper with him now or any other day. NOT the day of my surgery. Now he got pissed off and decided not to eat out and stayed with me. Because I told him I didn’t wanna eat anymore and didn’t wanna waste his time. Am I overreacting? Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

Should I be concerned with my daugthers beahvior?

My daughter will turn 3 July of this year. She and I have always given each other pecks on the cheek or lip, but that’s it, and she’s seen her father, and I give each other a quick peck on the lips, but that’s it. Recently, she’s begun trying to grab me in a weird way and kiss me with her mouth open, like French kissing, and she’s very insistent about it. She puts her hands on my face, tilts her head, acts like an adult would. I don’t know how seeing somebody kiss on tv could even show her to behave exactly this way. This is the only weird behavior she’s had, and she is only around her father, who she adores and doesn’t act uncomfortable with at all. I’m scared, and I just don’t know what to think…opinions? Had this happened to anybody? Do you think it’s possible she saw French kissing on television? Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

Do they make car seats for parents who have limited mobility with their hands?

Do they make car seats for parents who have limited mobility in their hands? I’ve slowly been losing mobility in my hands, particularly my right, but my symptoms are the same for both hands. Pain when lifting things, sudden electrical shock type feeling where my middle finger meets the palm of my hand, numbness in my pinky, ring, and middle finger, and I’m losing the ability to grasp items. I’ve had MRI and nerve tests done, and all have come back normal, so doctors are stumped as to why it’s occurring, and it’s not carpal tunnel as symptoms came on at the same time for both hands. This problem that I’m running into is this is making tightening the straps on both my kid’s car seats painful and difficult. My 5yos car seat has a crank on the side that you turn to tighten the straps and my 2yos car seat has a strap at the bottom you have to grab tight and pull. As much as I’d hate to have to buy two new car seats, unless my Drs can figure out what’s wrong, making sure my babies are strapped in properly is my priority. Anonymous Community MemberThis question …

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A single woman that I do not know is making plans with my husband: Should I be concerned?

Does anyone think it’s suspicious that a single woman(that I don’t know and have never met) is making plans(2 hours away) with my husband? It’s to participate in an obstacle course race. Now last year, I asked him to do one with me, but when the time came, I wasn’t ready(still recovering from giving birth). But I just have a very bad feeling about this; I don’t think it’s appropriate. I had caught him being unfaithful in the past(before we were married), and we are trying really hard to get past this, but I am not comfortable with this. He constantly tells me I am paranoid, and I need to stop living in the past, but he fucked me up so badly it’s hard to forget. (he was messaging on Instagram while I was in labor!) Needless to say, I was crushed and was a huge factor in my PPD. Now he says he can never do anything with his friends because I will make a big deal out of it, but he never asks me to go out. He just assumes. So now that he brought this activity up, I don’t know how to react. If it was with …

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I have trust issues: What should I do?

I was in an abusive marriage for many years, with a string of crappy men before that. I finally got away, got divorced, and was single for four years. I tried dating, but have trust issues. I feel leery and uncomfortable around men. I finally met someone whom I liked, he seemed honest, and I wanted to give out a try. We had a “just friends” relationship for a while. During this time, I caught him in a couple of lies. He apologized, we weren’t “together,” and I tried to move forward. We kept talking and became a couple. He has worked and worked to “show me who he is” and regain my trust. He takes full blame for the lies and doesn’t make excuses. After apology has been YEARS of him being and doing what he says, but I can’t move past it. I don’t trust him, but I want to. He’s not standing here with apologies and repeated bad behavior; he’s apologized and put his heart into showing me he means it. I have become someone awful, questioning, checking his phone, needing to know where he is all the time, reading into every word and action. I don’t …

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I have thoughts of leaving my husband because I cannot have kids: Advice?

I am devastated. Me SO and I have been trying to get pregnant for a while now. I did get pregnant in 2018, but I had a miscarriage while at work. I never told anyone because I didn’t want to break their hearts. And now, after my second miscarriage in November 2019, still didn’t tell anyone because I didn’t even know it until afterward, I feel like a horrible excuse for a woman. He had a hard time sleeping last night and was just talking, and he said, “We’ve been married for three years, and we can’t even have a kid. It’s embarrassing,” and it just broke my heart into a million pieces. I just cried silently. But now I can’t sleep, and I feel like I should just leave him so he can find someone who is able to have babies and make him happy. I pray every day for my rainbow baby, but it feels like it’ll never happen, and he shouldn’t have to go through that. Am I silly for thinking I should leave and allow him to find someone who can get pregnant? Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has …

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My husbands mom is very demanding: Advice?

Anonymous, please!! I just want honest feedback because I’m made out to be selfish from my in-laws. Long story short. My husband and I have one child 19; we also have a child who is 4. While our daughter is in college in another state, it’s just the three of us. My youngest was adopted at birth because we were not able to conceive, so he was a huge blessing after many failed fertility attempts. My husband’s mother is a very selfish lady, disguised in sheep’s clothing. She had other children but is obsessed with my husband. She puts our children last all the time if they’ve even thought about it at all. She has used my husband financially all of our marriage. She became ill around two years ago. My husband stays with her more than myself and my children. I want him to help his mother but not as much time as he’s spending away from our youngest. He’s missed so many important things because of his demanding mother. He even missed Christmas Eve and Christmas away from my children. She doesn’t even live an hour away. It’s like she gets a thrill of seeing how much he’ll …

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My sons dad’s family constantly talks badly about me: Advice?

My son’s dad and I have been together since we were teenagers. We share a four-year-old son. We got married & separated three years ago. We decided to make things work, but his family hates me and makes my life impossible. They are always judging & criticizing me. They always talk bad about me. We both made mistakes, but it seems like what he did goes unseen & I am the bad one. I try to be understanding respectful. It is so hard when they are always saying nasty things to him about me, but it just seems like it will never work with his family always getting in the way. Has anyone ever gone through this? Does it get better? Should I just stop trying and let things go? Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

Who should pay the babysitter?

My husband and I are going away for my cousin’s wedding. We can’t take the kids (they weren’t invited). My mother in law is watching them overnight but asked if I could get her some help for a few hours since she’ll be with them overnight. I got a sitter to come to help her with baths, dinner, and bedtime (coming at 3/4 staying until 9). My question is… who should be responsible for paying for the sitter? Me or my MIL? Let me say I’m willing to do it, but I think she should be able to handle the kids without help (my mother had taken my kids for long weekends on occasion with no issue). Advice, please? TIA Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

How can I help my dad with his drug addiction?

I usually am not one to do this, but I am at an absolute loss. My dad is 47 years old, and he is in so deep with drug addiction, he has had a hard life, but you would never guess it when you meet him he has the biggest heart and would literally give the shirt off his back to help someone he’s my best friend, but he’s been on a downward spiral for the last couple of years. He’s currently incarcerated myself, and my family members have decided to stop bailing him out. My question is if anyone had dealt with a loved one who is struggling with addiction and if them being in jail helped them or steps, I could take to help him. I’m so scared I will lose him forever to this addiction. Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

How can I dry up my milk supply?

Please don’t judge. I’m just looking for some advice. My baby is now five days old, and I love him to bits. So far, he has been mainly formula fed with a few breastfeeds that I’ve expressed milk into bottles for. I thought I wanted to primarily pump breast milk to bottles to feed him as this is what I did with my first, but this time around, I’m really not enjoying it and finding the whole thing overwhelming and uncomfortable. I have decided to stop the breast milk and just feed my baby formula. At the end of the day, a happy, healthy momma is what he needs, not a sore emotional momma who’s really not enjoying what should be a meaningful experience. My problem is my boobs are so uncomfortable, and I’m not sure about the best tactics to help dry up my supply. So far, I’ve only expressed a handful of times during the five days he’s been born, the most I’ve expressed is 35 ml out each boob. My question is, how should I Express to help dry up my supply? My boobs are huge and quite solid and uncomfortable. I know I can’t just stop …

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The guy I am seeing told me he is a cross dresser: Advice?

I recently started seeing a guy whom I like. He is passionate, caring, sweet, and makes me feel like I am the only girl in the world. I have never had that before. My ex-husband was mentally and emotionally abusive, so this is all new to me. I have a two-year-old daughter, and I have been very careful not to introduce her to anyone, and I don’t plan to anytime soon. My dilemma: The guy I am seeing has recently revealed to me that he’s a cross-dresser. He only does it at home, never out in public. He showed me his private “room,” where he keeps everything, and he has way more clothes than I do. And I have a lot. My question is, what would you guys do? I don’t know if it’s too much for me. I don’t know if I can get past this, and although I was very supportive of him when he told me, I don’t know if I’m okay with it. He says he would understand if I stopped seeing him. I asked if he liked men, but he said he was 100% sure he did not. Sooooo, HELP! Anonymous Community MemberThis question was …

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