Family / In Laws

I don’t want to go to my fiances mothers thankgiving: Am I wrong?

Ever since my fiancé and I got together it’s been nothing but the drama between his ex-wife and his mother hated me for no good reason, I treat his daughter like me own and even let them daddy-daughter time together. His mother said he was too good for me, and he needs to stop playing dad to my children, she’s called me clingy and has talked down on how I have three kids from different men which I believe has nothing to do with anything. His ex-wife doesn’t like me because god knows why but threats to call dcf on me if he daughter ever gets hurt when she’s at my house or if we’re at the park but yet she’ll ask if her daughter can come over when she wants to spend time with her friends. With all of that he’s still trying to make me go to his mothers for thanksgiving and Christmas and yes his ex will be there because it will make his daughter happy when I think we should just have or own thanksgiving and Christmas he can go to his moms to be with them @2 then come home to eat with us @6 …

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My in laws are buying my baby things that I wanted to buy: Am I over reacting?

I have a ten-month-old baby, and he is the first grandbaby for my in-laws, and with the holidays coming, they are buying him my first thanksgiving outfit, and also they just got him my first Christmas PJs. These don’t bother me that much, but they also got him an ornament that says my first Christmas and his name on it. Am I wrong for being so upset about this? I feel like this should be something I buy for him. They didn’t even ask before they got it. I don’t know what to do because it bothers me. I tell my husband and he just says I didn’t know what to say? I’m at my wits end with their need to be in control. Help please any advice would be GREAT Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

My brother in laws wife cheated and won’t let them back in their house: Advice?

Okay, so my brother in law(husbands brother) Is in a jam. His wife is cheating on him with a married man but still lives in the house that my brother in law pays for. She always threatens him with the kids and has even threatened the kids that if they tell daddy about her lover, they will never see him again. She had also told the kids that her married boyfriend broke her heart by getting married. She has four kids with my brother in law. She told him that she would call the cops if he doesn’t stay out of the house he pays for. She told him that he needed to get the kids out of the house this Saturday, but she isn’t allowing him to take them to his family’s house. The only time she wants anything to do with my brother in law is when he gets his paycheck. I knew her from before they got married because our moms were friends. She used to try and rub herself all over her mom’s boyfriends. She has also caused a lot of drama for the family. He has also bought her a brand new car that she …

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Should I tell my mother in law how she is making me feel or let it be?

I have been having an issue with my mother in law. My husband and two children and I currently live and rent out rooms from her home. She convinced us to move in when my husband was transitioning to a job closer to here. We are planning to move out in the next few months. So here’s the issue. When we first moved in, everything went great. We got along really well. I always went out of my way to clean, cook, pay her bills, which she asked me to do for her. And many other things she asked of me. I have literally done any and everything she’s asked me to and has always treated her with kindness and respect. A few months ago, she just started to say things here and there like little jabs. It started when we went for a walk together, and she told me she told her daughter how annoying I was. She talks about my skin, my hair, how I dress, what I cook. She talks about my parenting and how my son loves her the most, and she’s the only one who plays with him, which is so completely untrue. It seems …

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My mother in law is mad that we aren’t buying her a gift this year: Advice?

So I need some advice. My husband and I hate Christmas because we get stressed out about what to buy family members. I started buying my MIL Christmas decor because she told me that’s what my husband always bought her growing up, and she loved it. I’d buy something of quality too. Pottery barn etc. Well, then, she seemed annoyed. She told me not to buy any more Christmas decor. So I took note that she liked massages and so I bought her a $130 gift certificate. As just a little bonus treat, I bought her some candy that she told me she loved. Then afterward, she tells me gift cards and gift certificates are not personal enough. One year my SIL and I got together and had all the grandkids take a nice photo together, and we had it put on a canvas. She said she didn’t know where she’d put it. She doesn’t like lotion or jewelry. She does like candles, but I already bought her six large Yankee candles last year, and I know she’ll say something negative about it again. As you can see, it’s making me so unhappy during the holidays, and my husband agrees …

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How should I handle this situation with my husband and his sister?

Hey, I need some advice! Here’s the backstory: my husband is about ten years older than his sister, and they have always been fairly close. As they grew older and he was out of the house, and she was primarily at her dad’s, they became more distant, which is normal. When I came around when she was 18 was about the same time, she started to really change. She became a major hippie, was a smoking pot with her dad, and doing all kinds of hallucinogenic drugs, then allowed her 23yo bf to move into her room, and my husband didn’t approve, so communication was limited. When we had our kid, she was happy to be an aunt, swore she’d come around more etc…and it never happened. I’ve seen her maybe five times since our son’s birth, which was almost three years ago. Well, a few months ago she got into a huge fight with her bf, things got kind of physical, and they split up- dad kicked HER out and allowed her bf to stay. She was couch surfing and stayed in her car for over a month sleeping in a beach parking lot. Of course, my husband being …

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My husbands step-dad has been making me feel uncomfortable: What should I do?

My husband and I just recently made a massive move to a different state we moved in with his mom and stepped dad everything is wonderful!!! But here lately, his stepdad is starting to weird me out. He constantly walks up behind me, grabs my hips in a “playful” Way, and says hey or whatever it’s just weird!!! Well last night I was standing in the kitchen with my husband’s mom who I guess is either blind or doesn’t think anything of it but my husband stepdad walked up behind me put his arms all way around my waist (like a husband would) and asked me how my day was!!! I really wanna tell my husband that is stepdad is doing these things, and it’s making me feel some type of way, but I’m also terribly afraid to start anything!!! HELP should I tell my husband Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

My boyfriends brother hates me and makes up rumors: Advice?

My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over two years; we have a one-month-old together. Through the years, his oldest brother has caused nothing but problems. He’s tried to break us up, he makes rumors about me, through my whole pregnancy he told everyone that the baby was not my boyfriend’s and even convinced him to leave me (that only lasted for a couple of weeks until he found out the truth.) Well, to this day, my boyfriend still talks to him. The brother refuses to see his niece because of me and has had every chance in the world to meet her. I know it’s his brother, but he goes off and does jobs for him and with him, and they talk. I just don’t think it’s right, and it’s showing his brother that this behavior is okay, and it’s not. What do you think I should do? I’ve tried talking to him about this saying that I’ve given him a chance after chance, but he still does these things and that I don’t appreciate him letting his brother get away with it. NOTE: I really do not know why his brother has such a big …

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My MIL wants to take my kids out of town but it makes me uncomfortable: Thoughts?

Can you post please?? so just need some opinions. I’m married, but my husband no longer in the picture. He went to prison and will be there for a very long time. He’s an only child. Well, my mother in law scares me with how fake she seems to be. She and my husband’s older kids are a mom who is very close. I’ve always respected her(my mother n law) until this past year. She’s done some shady shit to me. That’s including stuff involving the other mom. Anyways recently, we got into it over her wanting to take 2 of my kids out of town. At the same time as my husband’s older kids and where the other mom is. I told her no, I wasnt.comfortable with it. I just feel like what the both done to me in the past and her taking my kids now just isn’t sitting well with me. Well, she blew up and defended the other mom. The other mom and I have had some words this past year, and it wasn’t good. So Isk I just feel like she could be mean to my kids, and my mother n law would allow it. …

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I got in a fight with my family and now I don’t want them to come thanksgiving: Advice?

So long story short because of my four year old my dog got pregnant, and we had an accidental litter of puppies (the spay appointment was literally two weeks away when she went into heat and got pregnant). My mother in law decided she wanted one of our puppies. Seeing as we only care about them going to a good home, we gave her a pick of the litter, and she couldn’t choose between our two male pups. So once the puppies were weaned enough to be away from their mother for a bit, we drove over (2 hrs away) and let her see them. The puppies were six weeks old at this point. There was a large family get together, everyone enjoyed seeing the puppies, and my MIL picked one out. Well… Here is where the problem starts. My father in law believes that puppies can be separated from their mom at six weeks. All the research I’ve is done, breeders I’ve talked to, and even the state law says puppies need to be with their mom for eight weeks minimum. I insisted that they could have him at eight weeks and that I would not let it leave …

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I feel like my MIL doesn’t care to spend alone time with my daughter: Advice?

My daughter (1-year-old) sees her grandparents about once a month. Only when we bring her to their house, and we live about an hour away. They never ask to see her or about her and half the time act like it’s an inconvenience to keep her. Meanwhile, they see my niece ( same age) 2-3 days a week and about 12 hours on Saturday and Sunday. They live closer and don’t have anything else to do. It really drives me crazy then, when we ask my MIL to have my daughter, my niece is there EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. Is it bad that I would like my daughter to spend some one on one time with her grandparents every once in a while? She only has one grandma. And being blunt about it isn’t an option because in the past, if we’ve brought up the unfairness,, we just get told: “ we’re looking for problems”. In retrospect, I know this is probably a little bit of jealousy, but it doesn’t change the fact that my daughter deserves one on one time like my niece has 2-5 days a week…. Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who …

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My husbands family doesn’t like me: What should I do?

Hi, my family in law doesn’t like me and they think that I’m not a good mother or wife, they talk on my back, specifically my mother in law and my brothers-in-law girlfriend, and I don’t know how to react by their comments and faces, I had a problem breastfeeding and they judge me about it, my mother in law made me a lot of comments about how I parenting my baby girl, she’s 3 months old and make a lot of faces, she’s so cute, and when she makes an angry face they said that’s because of me, that she learned from me, they watching everything thing I do My husband told me that my actions hurt them because I choose to ignore them, but he doesn’t realize that his family makes me feel like a stranger and like if I am the nanny and not the mom. Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

My MIL tries to tell my husband how to parent: Advice?

I started working on the weekends while my husband is working weekdays and going to school on Mondays and Wednesdays. I take care of our daughter all week, and he takes care of her on the weekends. We’re living in my inlaws till hopefully this December. The thing is my MIL is always on my husband’s back whenever he takes care of my daughter. He has some flaws that he needs to work on as he goes to playing games after he takes care of our daughter, and he knows that my MIL is taking care of our daughter. My MIL doesn’t like it; she wants him to watch her at all times plus do some chores. I understand that, but dads have different ways of taking care of their kids, and the same goes for the moms. My MIL wants me to just stay at home again, and my husband works every day. I wanna work at least a couple of days, to get out, to have me-time, to help provide and contribute to our family. But MIL doesn’t trust her own son to change and be a better father to our child. I know my husband relays on …

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I feel like my elderly MIL is invading my space: Advice?

My husband and I were recently married. His mother came to live with us earlier this year. She’s 80. We quickly realized she could not reside inside the home with us, so she decided to purchase a camper and park it next to our house. I swear it’s been a roller coaster of hell since March. She constantly manipulates. She no longer drives, and therefore, it is up to us to take her places that she needs to go. When she moved in, we set a rule that we would give her one day during the week and one day on the weekend to run errands for her. My work schedule allows me to take her places during the day of the week. But every time I go to ask her if she needs to go anywhere she tells me no she doesn’t feel good, she waits until my husband gets home at 6 o’clock at night and expects him to take her to run errands and to the grocery store or to the BAR. And then expects us to come back and get her later in the evening. We generally try to be in bed by eight or 9 …

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My husbands family hates me: What should I do?

What do I do when my husbands family hates me. They’ve never approved of me, and recently, things escalated so much that one of them called me a bitch. I’m thinking of divorce at this point, and even though I love my husband and he’s willing to x them from our lives. I don’t want to continue to blame for him not wanting to spend time with them. We have kids, work lives, and they don’t understand why we can just drop everything for them, so they think it’s my fault. Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

I think my kids are being treated differently than my SOs kids: Help?

So my is going away for a long time. My mother in law IDK if she likes to thinks she’s helping me out what. But my so and I have four Lil kids, and she likes us to go stay with her every few weeks. Well, I noticed she takes my.so older kids to expensive places and buys them expensive toys. I feel like my kids are less than. I just feel like shes a flake. I always see her buying them expensive toys.and my kids get hand me downs. Not fair IDK how to approach her. Cause anything u say to her, she gets defensive. But it’s been brought up several times. Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

I’ve asked my family numerous times not to post my kids online but they do: Advice?

Advice: I am a single mother of 3 children and a bipolar schizophrenic with PTSD (from trauma in my life from past relationships and from my own family members) I have become estranged from my siblings and their kids and significant others because of situations that put me in. My ‘brothers’ lied to try and have my kids put in foster care (for example). I have asked my mother repeatedly not to share my kids and my life with her other children, as they are not part of OUR family. I have asked repeatedly for her to not share pictures of my kids on her Facebook page. She doesn’t care about my mental health enough to even research what a bipolar schizophrenic is. Doesn’t care about any of my requests as their mother. Argues nonstop about my wishes both for myself and my kids. I get flashbacks, not in a good way, when she just mentions their name to me. Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

How did you handle your parents/in-laws letting your kids get away with things?

So how did you guys navigate parenting with your parents & in laws when they are babysitting your children? I’m not a fan of the whole “grandma/grandpa let’s me do this” or “grandma/grandpa let me have this”. my parents are really stuck in there ways and I know its gonna be a problem. Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

What age should a child have their own room?

At what age is appropriate for siblings to have their own room/privacy? My daughter is ten and currently going through the “changes.” Her brother is 8. At their dad’s three-bedroom house, they are forced to share a room because dad’s GF moved her 20 yr old son in. I know it’s not my house, but I don’t feel that they should be sharing a room. I was molested and raped by my older brother (18 months older), and we didn’t even share a room. I am a concerned mama for my babies! Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

My son takes a while to warm up to people but my mother in law grabs him anyways: Advice?

My son is 2, and shy around those he doesn’t know. My mother-in-law is someone who picks and chooses when it’s convenient for her to see him. (Which is never) we see my husband’s family for birthdays and holidays, that’s it. (Side note my in-laws have six other grandchildren who are all older now and doesn’t have a relationship with any of them) When we do see them, it takes a while for my son to warm up, but my mother in law basically comes right up to him, totally ignoring me, and grabs him. She’s done it since he’s a baby and he would cry. Now he’s at the age where he just says, “mommy!” And wants me to just be with him. He also has all of the other kids who just all run up and want to see him. Eventually, he warms up, but it just takes a while. How can I go about this? I’ve said to give him time etc, but she just doesn’t care and blames me for him wanting to be with me. I have extreme anxiety every time I go there anyway because of other things, but this just adds to it. …

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