Spouses / Partners

Am I over reacting?

Hey all, would it piss you off if your S/O were looking at a picture of a celebrity and saying they wouldn’t f**k her because of whatever reason? Or am I too sensitive? I don’t know, guess I just don’t really like my S/O talking about having sex with anyone else but me? Am I dumb? Please be nice lol. Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

My husband got mad that I wanted to sleep over with my friends: Advice?

Hi, I’m a working mom of my wonderful daughter. She’s turning four. My husband and I had a big misunderstanding last night. I was asking him if I could sleepover with my best friends, who are gays and girls, no straight man. We usually do that once in a while, like once every three months or more. I do have two jobs: a public school teacher at day and a tutor to three students after duty. Aside from that, I do have many extra jobs just to support our family since I asked him to go back to school while he’s still young. He got really upset that I wanna hang out with my friends even he knew them all. All I want is a break, and now he’s telling me that I ain’t happy being a mom. I just want some time with my friends, which seldom happens. I have worked two months after I underwent CS, and I was happy to do that for our family. Any advice? Ps. I was the one who pushed my husband to go back to school ’cause I want him to pursue his dreams. Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a …

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I built up the courage to leave my husband and need support: Thoughts?

Last night, I finally built up the courage to tell my husband that I was finished with our marriage. I always told him to please try talking to me more, love me more, make me feel like I’m worth his time, give me some attention…. he still doesn’t. Enough is enough. He is shocked & upset, which I expected. He’s also hurt, which I ALSO expected. I’m hurt too. I can’t stand how he treats our girls. He pushes them away, doesn’t give them attention, no love, no affection between a father and his daughters, doesn’t play with them, doesn’t read books with them, he always yells…. again, enough is enough. I told him to try more, do more — still nothing. I AM LEAVING. I need to RUN. I don’t want to look back and regret it, saying things like “I should’ve left. I should’ve done this and that” DO IT NOW. Be on my own with the kids, and we’ll be happier. Right now, it’s really hard going through this.. one day at a time. Please tell me you’re going through this too. I really need support right now. Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook …

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My husband is leaving me and I don’t know how to survive: Advice?

Hey, all you amazing Mamas, needing some kind and advice and real help. I’ve been a stay at home mom for the past two years my daughter is 5 in kindergarten now. My husband wants to separate and Idk how to survive. I have no job, no money of my own, and no family I can turn too. I live in NYC as well, which I can’t afford even a studio apartment. Please help I’m so depressed and hurt. I don’t know how to move on right now and survive. Thank you and God bless. Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

My husband is always tired and I am stressed: Advice?

Hello, I need some opinions here.. I am a mother of three, 13, 3, and a one-year-old. I have been together with my husband for six years. We have the youngest children together; the oldest is of my own. I am starting to get very stressed, frustrated and fed up, no matter how long hubby sleeps, he is always tired, he works (regular daytime hours) and I am a stay at home mum, which we both agreed to since before we had the 1st baby together, so we don’t have to worry about childcare costs. Our youngest still doesn’t sleep all night, and he is still on the breast, he has no interest in bottles, so he wants breast often during the night. I haven’t had a whole night sleep in over a year, so I feel quite tired myself, with all the broken sleep. I try to be understanding, but it’s really starting to bother me that hubby can’t sit down for a few minutes without constantly falling asleep, doesn’t matter if we are doing something together, at his parents for a visit or a meal, he’s constantly falling asleep, at home, he could be trying to feed one …

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I am miserable with my marriage: Thoughts?

Does anyone feel like they would get more help with their kids if they just got a divorce? I am so sick of being miserable in my marriage – our marriage has not been happy in quite some time – and doing it all by myself. I’ve realized recently that I have stuck around for them and for the “help” but that I am doing them more harm growing up in a “toxic” relationship. And I don’t get any help anyway, so why not live my life and be happy with my kids?! Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

I am on the fence about divorce: Advice?

I’ve been on the fence of whether I want a divorce or not. My husband is the best dad and a great husband, except for a few things. We’ve communicated over and over what we want from each other, and it hasn’t changed. I do everything from the cooking, cleaning, laundry, handling everything with our kids, grocery shopping, paying half the bills, and he maybe cooks once in a while and takes the trash out but moans about it. He is not affectionate whatsoever, and I’ve made it clear that I would like him to try and be more affectionate. I always initiate sex, and if I get lucky, it’s once a week because he is never in the mood. We would never talk or cuddle or kiss if I were just to stop trying. Recently we have discussed changing shifts at work because he is always so exhausted, which is fine whatever, but we would only see each other between 11 pm and 6 am during the weekdays, and we would be off on the weekends. Right now, we have weekday evenings together, and we’re off on the weekends. So he would have no family time in the evenings …

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I am not longer in love: thoughts?

My daughter is 14 months old . And after being with her dad for 6 years , I’m just not in love anymore . I knew this prior to even getting pregnant and the pregnancy /first year pretty much distracted me well untill now, I don’t know what to do, or how to tell him. He moved away from all his family to be with me and now I just simply don’t want to be in a romantic relationship with him anymore . I’m terrified of what will come of our situation and how we will share time with my daughter …. anyone ever split up and have the other parent live across the state ? How does this go Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

Husbands and housework

My husband is open to doing housework, but I feel that delegating him to do so is another task in itself. It gets overwhelming. I feel like it’s unfair. Are their men out there? Who just know to do these things. He just isn’t mindful of housework at all or what it takes to run a house like grocery lists, our appointments, and etc. I am wondering if it’s me. Maybe I’m not strict enough, and I just have to lay out a plan on how to truly split the work. Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

My husband is an addict and I am having trust issues: Advice?

My husband is a recovering addict, and I am struggling with trust issues. He lied to my face for years, but he says it was only about drugs. He says that should not make me mistrust him in other areas. I am struggling with trusting him. Thoughts? Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

I found out my husband is talking and flirting with his exes: Advice?

I want to ask for advice anonymously. My husband and I have been married for 3 1/2 years, I have two children from a previous marriage, he has one from a previous marriage, and we have a one-year-old together. When I got pregnant – it was unplanned- he blamed me and was resentful. He refused intimacy throughout the pregnancy and until the baby was ten months old. I felt awful, rejected, and disregarded. Moving forward about four months ago, we talked and agreed to work in our marriage, and had been doing so successfully. Until about a week ago when I found out, he has been texting and talking to former girlfriends, flirting and sexting. He even met up with one of them while out of town. He claims nothing physical happened, and they are just friends. He says I have nothing to worry about, that he only reached out to them because I have been too tired and busy to give him the attention he needed lately – the children have been sick, our son was hospitalized, I myself was sick and we have had family visiting. We both work full time, but I do all the childcare and …

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Am I wrong for being upset that my husband has female friends?

Am I wrong for being upset about my husband having female friends that aren’t friends with me? Part of me feels like I am overreacting. Thoughts? **Edit** just found out that this particular female has a “thing” for my husband. Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

Would you leave your SO over mistreating your kids?

Let me say first that my husband is NOT PHYSICALLY abusing them or sexually abusing them, anything like that. Am I thinking more like emotional/mentally abused or MAYBE NOT? i guess it depends on what you think about what i have to say.. I have two girls(7 & 4) who did previous relationships and a 1.5-year-old son with my husband. I can’t stand how he treats my girls like… he doesn’t read books with them; he doesn’t give them attention, he constantly yells and discipline them, doesn’t play board/card games with them, doesn’t snuggle with them, not loving towards them, doesn’t give them attention, it goes on and on. I’m already considering divorcing him. I do not want my children growing up with a dad like that. It’s not what I want in a father/husband. I’ve only been with him for almost five years. He’s definitely not the same person from 5 years ago. Also, he doesn’t give me attention, doesn’t hug me, not really much of a talker; he’s constantly on the couch with his iPad every night. I’ve told him to do something with the girls, stop yelling, etc. just seems like he isn’t going to change. I’m …

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I am unsure about what to do with my relationship: Advice?

Can you please post anonymously. I need to vent/help. So to make a long story short. My SO of 11 years and the father of our four children, has been verbally abusive with in the past two years or so. It’s not a constant thing but more when he gets mad. Well, I recently found out that he has been messaging other women, I’m not sure if he’s had sex with them, but I’m almost positive he has. I want to leave, but with my kids being 9, 8, 5, and 1, it would be hard. And he is a good dad to them. He just sucks as a partner. Well, he has always been the provider. I’ve never worked beside a temp part-time when I was younger (about ten years ago). Since I have no job, I also have no money or car. It’s all his, so if I leave, I will struggle with the kids taking them to school and appointment. Now, if I’d leave, it would be to my parents, but they have been trying to sell their house for over a year now. And I feel selfish to ask then to take us in and have …

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My husband got someone pregnant while we were on a “break: Advice?

So my husband and I have been together for 15 years. We had a little bit of a rough patch and decided to separate, while we were not together he got someone pregnant on a one night stand. He has no relationship with her whatsoever, but he does pay child support. We got back together before she had the baby, and we now live across the country from her and his son. My big question or concern is that he/we has no relationship with his son either. It’s very hard because they live across the country from us, and he’s too young to communicate with. My husband is an amazing father and partner, so he is torn as well. With the distance, are we better off letting her raise him and keeping our distance, or should we try for more? My husband has been having a very hard time and has seemed to develop an “out of sight, out of mind” attitude. We can’t afford to fly back and forth to visit regularly. If we wait until he’s older, will it be too late? We also have two children, and we haven’t told them. Should we, or should we wait …

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My SO refuses to be intimate with my since having a baby: Advice?

I have a baby that just turned three months old, and he was kind of a surprise, but absolutely adored. Now his dad, (we have three kids total together) is refusing to have sex because he is “terrified” I’ll get pregnant again. I can’t use hormonal birth control because it severely negatively affects me, and I’m not ready to tie my tubes yet. I bought a box of condoms and even offered to use vaginal stuff and track my periods, but he is avoiding me like the plague and its starting to get to me… this has started to cause a lot of anger and resentment between both of us and its beginning to be like walking on eggshells. We have been together almost ten years so no I’m not going to pack up and leave just because of lack of intimacy, but how do I stop feeling wounded or rejected and live daily without being angry (let’s face it I KNOW I am not the only gal that gets bitchy after going a time without getting any…) Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

My husband told me I need to work more: Advice?

Just a question here for all the moms or dads. My husband had career-making good money when we met. I was making minimum wage at a job I liked helping kids. When I got pregnant, I was obviously the one to stay home and take care of the kids. Fast forward two kids later. Both are in school. I immediately went and got two part-time jobs minimum wage, of course. I have one job now, and I try my best to help out, but it’s hard to keep steady income when I have to be the one to stay home when they are sick, snow days, school vacations, and summer break. We don’t have grandparents to pick them up or stay home with them. I picked up extra shifts at my job granted. It’s still only 20 hours a week, but I got cut hours because I call out too much between both kids. According to my husband, I’m not “hungry” enough; I don’t try enough. He expects me to work more, which I can’t do at this point but my boss won’t give me the hours because I’m not reliable. He says he could help by picking them up …

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Everyone tells me my husband is emotionally abusive: Thoughts?

So my question is, what do you do when everyone around you sees my husband is emotionally abusive. And what I mean about is I ask a simple question, and he snaps saying I don’t ask stupid questions or yells at you cause you didn’t get one thing done. Mind you have a ten-month-old daughter and work full time, he does go to school Monday thru Thursday and works Friday Saturday and Sunday. But it seems like he gets done with classes early and all he wants to do is play video games. Sorry this is all over the place right now I’m not okay, and I need help. Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

How can I cope with the fact that my husband had an emotional affair?

Hi, if you could anonymously post my question below about how to handle the aftermath of an emotional affair, I would REALLY appreciate it! I’m in a tough spot, and the folks on this page are awesome about giving straightforward advice. Thank you so much!! My husband had an emotional affair with a woman online. They never met, but before he ended it, they were talking about leaving their respective spouses and starting a life together. She was encouraging him to leave and divorce me while claiming she was extremely unhappy in her own marriage. We are in therapy addressing why he felt the need to do this, and it’s too soon to say what the outcome will be for us, but it’s done him a lot of good. He is extremely remorseful and has been completely transparent about what was said and shared with her. One thing that really seems to bother him is he doesn’t think her husband even has a clue she was getting ready to leave him. When my husband changed his mind, she, of course, was angry. In her mind, it was my fault even though He was the one begging for a second chance. …

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My SO has been talking to another female behind my back: Thoughts?

Anonymous, please. So my S/O and I have been together for four years. We broke up late 2018 due to him talking to another girl online. Basically, he was confiding in her more than me and talking crap about me to her. When I confronted him about it, I told him to choose between her and I. He ended up choosing her, and we broke up. We recently got back together May of last year, and we’re expecting a baby boy this April. I found out yet again that he was talking to her. One of the conditions to us getting back together was for him to delete the server, which he talked to her and not talk to her ever again. He left his twitter open, and I saw him communicating with her again. Their conversations had nothing negative against me this time, but it’s the fact that he went behind my back and did it again after I told him not too. We’re about to start a family, and I honestly don’t know what to do. Am I overreacting? Anonymous Community MemberThis question was asked by a Facebook community member who has asked to remain anonymous.

My SO won’t take me on a date but went with a co worker: Advice?

Ok, ladies, I know this sounds absolutely pathetic, but I’m seriously lonely. I have a SO and three kids in the home. The youngest I’m still breastfeeding, and he’s almost 17 months. I constantly make it known to my SO that I want to go out on a date. A DATE. That’s not ridiculous, right? I’m working on getting an amazing job from the education that I’ve obtained, but the process is long, and it’s been costing us money. We both know that it’ll be totally worth it, in the end, to have both sides earning good incomes. It’s just been very, very stressful. So the other night, I brought it up to him that I wanted to go on a date without kids (I know I’m sooo horrible). And then two days later, he runs into an old coworker and goes out for lunch with her, in the meantime I have my 17-month-old and getting all the necessary docs. I need this job. I just wish he would have taken me on a lunch date, especially since I made it known that that’s what I wanted. Yes, I am the person that posted about the “former coworker” and the …

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My husband treats my son differently and he notices: Advice?

I and my husband of almost seven years met when my son was 1 yr old. He was good to my son up until he was about 5 when our daughter was born. I am very observant and started to notice he would treat my son differently than our daughter (ignoring him, no longer playful, making faces, getting upset almost if I bought i something.) I ignored it for a while; then, it started getting worse (never physical.) I finally confronted him, but he kept denying it and brushed it off. Until this day, he always contradicts me when it comes to my son and if my daughter wants soda for example and he gives her some, my son (like any other kid) asks if he can get some too , he’ll say no. I asked him why not and he’ll shake his head and not say anything (like if I was offending him) We’ve gotten into arguments over how he treats him but he makes me feel like I’m overreacting. Advice? (PS my son’s father passed away when he was little) he’s really attached to our daughter; giving in to everything she wants, being extra cuddly and loveable with …

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I think I married my husband to soon: Advice?

I have a question, and I need advice my husband and I have been married almost a year it’s been ups and downs, but we always manage to work things out. I love my husband so much, but I think we got married too soon we only knew each other for three months before we married, I left my life in Maryland to relocate to Tennessee where he lived, he does everything for me, but there are a few things about him that I don’t like, the way he talks to his mom is atrocious, he sometimes talks to me in such a demeaning way that it makes me sick to my stomach when you don’t do things the way he wants he can be the meanest, nastiest person you ever want to meet on top of that he has gotten physical with me twice, he doesn’t feel like women should think for themselves and that men should do the thinking. A lot of times I am disgusted with his views on women Lately things have been going pretty good between us, but I am still on edge because he can go off at any minute, he tells me things …

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