Most parents can’t help but laugh when they hear the words ‘regular routines’ and ‘children’ in the same sentence – not because kids following a routine is wrong or weird, but because it’s such a difficult task to achieve.
I mean, let’s be honest – when was the last time you set a schedule and your child actually followed it? Better yet, how many times has your child started a daily routine only to give up on it several days later?
It’s okay – adopting a routine and committing to schedules doesn’t come easy to everyone, especially when you add children to the equation, but that doesn’t mean you should abandon them completely.
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Mamas Uncut Investigates the Topic
Routines and schedules was the topic of discussion recently in our Answers by Mamas Uncut forum.
“Does anyone else not have a daily routine for their kids?” one of our anonymous readers asked. It didn’t take long for our community of mothers to rush in and offer their opinion – and most were in alignment.
“We have a schedule. No one follows the schedule. Most of the time we get busy and just have to wing it,” one mother responded. Others detailed what their so-called ‘semi-routine’ looks like on a daily basis.
Another mother wrote:
“We have a loose routine. Like getting up for school & getting ready is the same every day. Afternoons are free time but starting around 5ish we fall back into routine- supper, homework, baths, bedtime.”
10 Benefits of Schedules & Routines for Children
While schedules and routines aren’t always practical – things are bound to get in the way at some point – they still play a vital role in a child’s growth and development and should be utilized as much as possible.
“A routine provides a clear structure for daily life,” said Joanne Frost, host of Supernanny UK.
“When you think about all of the things you have to get done during the day, it can be very overwhelming. As a parent you have to get all of that stuff done, but with your children following close behind,” she said.
Parents and caregivers are encouraged to use routines and schedules as a flexible framework that can accommodate life’s many surprises yet provide continuity that nurtures a child’s growth and well-being.
But for those who are still on the fence, here are 10 reasons why schedules and routines are important.
10. Circadian Rhythm Development
According to the NIH, circadian rhythm is defined as the ‘24-hour internal clock in your brain that regulates cycles of alertness and sleepiness by responding to light changes in your environment.’
It’s what wakes us up in the morning and what puts us to sleep at night.
Establishing a regular routine – especially with sleeping and eating habits – helps your child develop a healthy circadian rhythm that falls in line with their 24-hour biological clock, which is essential to growth.
9. Establishes Clear Expectations
Most parents, if not all, are well aware of the power struggle that happens when a child is told what to do. It doesn’t matter if you ask them to get ready for bed or pick up their toys – they’re reluctant to do so.
Well, that can change once you start implementing a regular routine or schedule.
A routine helps children understand and accept what’s expected of them. They’ll grow accustomed to their routine and, instead of arguing about doing what’s told of them, they’ll start doing it voluntarily.
8. Teaches Confidence & Independence
As your child starts doing things voluntarily, they grow more confident in their abilities and gain a sense of independence that they wouldn’t have otherwise.
With confidence and independence comes growth – and, eventually, pride.
Each completed task, no matter how small, reinforces your child’s capability and promotes a sense of accomplishment. This internal reward incentivizes them to repeat their behavior time and time again.
7. Time Management & Self-Discipline
Children often have difficulty understanding the concept of time, but getting them involved in a routine at an early age can help teach them the importance of managing their time and disciplining themselves.
It also teaches them how to prioritize tasks based on urgency.
For example, completing homework before watching TV teaches them to prioritize obligations over leisure. Over time, those priorities will become goals – and those goals will become accomplishments.
6. Strengthening Family Bonds
Regular routines and schedules allow your child to learn and appreciate family values, interests, and beliefs. This not only makes them feel like a part of the team, but it strengthens the family as a whole.
Family meals and weekend outings are perfect examples of this in action.
These shared experiences allow family members to connect, communicate, and enjoy each other’s company. I think we can all agree that there’s nothing more beautiful than a family that sticks together.
5. Sense of Stability & Security
A structured day with clear boundaries and expectations helps children feel more safe, comfortable, stable, and secure, while also providing a sense of normalcy in a world full of uncertainty and variability.
In a way, it takes the stress and anxiety out of their day-to-day routine.
Routines and schedules can also help them manage their feelings better, knowing that there is a time and place for everything – including times to be active and alert, as well as times to be relaxed and calm.
4. Make Transitions Easier for the Child
Many children struggle with transitioning from one activity to the next. For example, some children might find it difficult to transition from playtime to mealtime – or from watching television to going to sleep.
A routine can help them better prepare for these transitions.
In fact, you can make these transitions even easier by starting a five-minute timer before switching tasks or activities. This gives them five minutes to finish what they’re doing before moving on to the next task.
3. Prepares Them for the Future
Getting your child into a regular routine at an early age helps prepare them for what lies ahead in the future. It gives them a headstart in life, allowing them to learn skills and habits before they’re necessary.
By the time they need those skills, they’ll already be honed and sharpened.
This gradual but consistent training through routine readies them not just for the practical aspects of managing life’s demands but also for the emotional and psychological rigors of adult responsibilities.
2. Starting Their Day Off Right
When children start their day with a structured and predictable series of tasks, they’re beginning their day with a sense of order and purpose – which can enhance their mood and performance throughout the day.
It’s the equivalent of ‘waking up on the right side of the bed.’
A normal morning routine for a child includes waking up, making their bed, using the bathroom, washing their hands and face (or taking a bath), getting dressed, eating breakfast, and brushing their teeth.
1. Ending Their Day Right, Too!
Where a regular morning routine helps children start their day on the right foot, a regular bedtime routine helps them end their day in a positive, safe, and comfortable way.
Put the two together, and you have a recipe for success!
A normal bedtime routine for a child includes having a small snack, going to the bathroom, taking a bath, brushing their teeth, changing into their pajamas, and playtime – followed by winding down, of course.
10 Tips for Maintaining a Regular Routine With Your Child
From toddlers to teenagers, a consistent routine fosters an environment where young minds can thrive, but too much structure and too strict of a schedule can actually end up doing more harm than good.
As a parent, it’s important that you find that healthy balance between enough, but not too much.
“Before you can insist on certain standards of behavior from your child, you have to decide what is acceptable and what is not. Then you have to stick to your guns,” said Supernanny UK’s Joanne Frost.
If you’re trying to implement or enforce a new routine or schedule, here are some tips to help you along.
10. Start Small, Then Slowly Build
Going from not having a routine to suddenly having a strict and regular routine is almost never a recipe for success, especially for a child who doesn’t fully understand the reason or importance behind the routine.
That’s why we recommend starting slow, and gradually building.
Start with something that’s already working. If your child does a good job at mealtime, start implementing a regular routine for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and snacks. Over time, add more tasks to their daily routine.
9. Be Patient – Routines Take Time
Adopting a new routine or getting used to a new schedule isn’t going to happen overnight – not for an adult, and certainly not for a child. It takes time to get their mind and body aligned with the change.
Your job, as their parent, is to remain patient and encourage progress.
When you set your expectations too high or too soon, you’re setting yourself (and your child) up for failure. Instead, try setting them up for success by guiding them through the process at their own pace.
8. Preach Consistency
A regular routine doesn’t exist without consistency. It’s the only way you’re going to get your child to open up to the idea and the only way they’re going to grow accustomed to their new day-to-day lifestyle.
That means once you implement the routine, you have to stay firm with it.
Research shows that most children will start to form habits by the age of 9, but even then – it could take anywhere from two weeks to six months to form a new habit, and the same goes for regular routines.
7. Maintain Flexibility
While consistency is important, you can make minor adjustments to your routine as your child grows and evolves. In fact, we encourage flexibility with any routine or schedule, especially when a child is involved.
It’s okay to shift away from the norm every once in a while.
Holidays are a great example of this. Bedtime might be at 8 pm every night, but it’s normal to let children stay up a little later on Christmas Eve. It’s good to let your child know that not everything is set in stone.
6. Set a Good Example
As with anything a parent does, mothers and fathers must always set a good example for their children. In this case, that means following a regular routine yourself – that way, they can see it done in real time.
You know what they saw – monkey see, monkey do.
More than just following a routine, parents need to be enthusiastic and passionate about those routines – otherwise their child won’t learn to appreciate the routine. They might follow it, but only as a formality.
5. Reward Positive Behavior
When children receive positive feedback or rewards for their actions, they are more likely to repeat those actions. In this case, rewarding children for completing tasks will increase the desirability of future tasks.
It also helps children feel good about themselves and their abilities.
Regular rewards for following routines help turn those actions into habits. Over time, the behavior becomes ingrained, and the child may no longer require external rewards to continue performing the task.
4. Create a Visual Schedule
Visual schedules use pictures and symbols to represent different parts of the day, making it easier for kids, particularly young kids and those with learning differences, to comprehend what is expected of them.
It’s like a calendar or agenda, but designed specifically for a younger child.
You can use a whiteboard, magnetic board, poster, or digital device (if your child uses one regularly). Some people use Velcro strips on a board, allowing them to attach and move around pictures easily.
3. Involve Your Child in the Planning Process
Allowing your child to take part in the planning process can lead to improved compliance, increased enthusiasm, and an even deeper understanding of time management and self-discipline principles.
Start by explaining why routines are important.
Listening to their preferences shows that you value their opinions and are more likely to lead to a routine they’re excited about following. Maintaining and nurturing that excitement is crucial during this step.
2. Routines vs. Schedules: What’s the Difference?
The terms ‘routine’ and ‘schedule’ are often used interchangeably, but it’s important to understand that they are two completely different words with completely different meanings. Most people have no idea.
A schedule is more time-oriented, while a routine is more task-oriented.
Routines aren’t necessarily bound by specific times but are more about the order in which tasks are performed. Most routines can be considered schedules if time is involved, but that’s not always the case.
1. Make It Fun for Everyone Involved!
This is perhaps the most important piece of advice we can give. When you make routines and schedules fun – something your child looks forward to on a daily basis – your child is more likely to succeed.
That means parents should participate in routine activities with their children whenever possible.
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To spice things up, try introducing themed days or turning routine tasks into small games or playful challenges – setting a timer to see if your child can beat their previous record for cleaning up toys. The key here is to make it fun for your child – encouraging them to continue the routine or schedule.