My Twin Sister Died and I Am Struggling to Get Through the Holidays: Advice?

My Twin Sister Died and I Am Struggling to Get Through the Holidays: Advice?

A mom writes in asking for advice on how to get through the holidays for her daughter after losing her beloved twin sister earlier this year. The mom admits that she feels like most of her friends have abandoned her because they don’t want to “deal with her emotions” but now she’s left feeling even more alone. Now she’s looking for advice on how not to fall apart during the holiday season.

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A member of the community asks:

“My twin sister died earlier this year and was very, very sick through the holidays last year. And most days, it doesn’t seem real that she’s gone because then I have to accept that a huge part of me is gone forever. But with the holidays coming up, I’ve been extra emotional as these will be the first major holidays without her.

My daughter has been wonderfully supportive and loving, and my parents and I are there for each other. But I feel like most of my friends have basically abandoned me because they don’t want to deal with my emotions, even though I don’t really talk about it that much. Only two friends even came to the funeral.

I guess I just don’t feel like I have much support at the moment when I need it the most, even though I’ve been there for all of my so-called ‘friends’ in the past when they needed someone. Sorry for the long rant, I guess my question is just asking for advice on how to manage the holidays this year without falling apart the whole time?”

– Mamas Uncut Community Member

Community Advice for This Mom Who Just Lost Her Twin Sister

To see what advice the Mamas Uncut Facebook community has for this mom in need, read the comments of the post embedded below.

Advice Summary

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Some thought it would be helpful for the grieving mom to see a therapist or a grief counselor. One commenter wrote, “I highly suggest seeing a therapist that specializes in grief and trauma. It really helped me. So sorry for your loss.”

Another woman added, “Fall apart, the only way to rebuild is to be broken. Lean on your family and good friends and take it one day at a time.”

And one person wrote, “You will fall apart. There’s no stopping that. Just be around family and loved ones who know what’s going on. Stay strong when you can and break down when you need to. Losing a loved one is hard especially if it’s your twin. Fight your hardest every day and with time the pain won’t be as bad. The breakdowns won’t be as frequent. You’ll never completely stop missing her but time will make it better. No matter how many years go by, holidays will always be the worst. Stay strong.”

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