One woman has several people stunned when she asked if she would be an a**h*le should she asked for a baby shower gift back.
Several days ago, a woman took to the AITA Reddit thread, writing, “I know this sounds awful and I feel like it might be a terrible thing to do so I need some advice.” According to the Reddit user, her husband’s “long term friend” revealed that she was pregnant a second time. In her pregnancy announcement, she also shared a link to her baby registry.
As the Reddit user continued, her husband bought his friend a special gift for her first child and did so again after she shared that she was having a second. “I had no issue with the gift or how much he spent, it was a nice item to gift her and we were excited for her to grow her family with her then boyfriend now husband.”
However, the Reddit user admitted that she “thought this was strange” for the friend to ask for more gifts given that this was her second child. “She should still have most of the items from her first kid and I didn’t think people usually did full blown baby showers/registries after their first,” the Reddit user wrote.
“I was also surprised she was asking for gifts when she was still in the first trimester, but I’m a cautious person who didn’t announce my pregnancy until 20 weeks which I know is extreme on the other side. I left it up to my husband what he wanted to do but mentioned to him that I was surprised she was organizing another shower/gifting event since she already has a young kid and got brand new stuff then.”
As it turns out, the husband made the decision to spend “around $400 on a gift for her, fine with me.” Sadly, a few weeks after announcing her pregnancy, the friend “had a traumatic miscarriage.”
“I won’t get into the details but she was devastated and the cause of the loss likely means she won’t be able to carry future pregnancies to term. It’s incredibly sad and while I’m not close with Jen my heart hurt for her,” the Reddit user wrote.
However, despite the trauma the friend had experience, the Reddit user is wondering if she should ask for the gift back her husband sent. Yikes.
“Asking her to return the gift seems cruel, like adding a chore onto her grief, and it’s probably past the return window anyway, the Reddit user admits, adding, “My husband and I are also decently high earners but $400 is still a lot of money.”
“It’s one thing if she’s able to get a few years of use out of the item, that’s money well spent. But if it’s going to sit in a box in her attic for years….that’s where we are getting stuck.
So, would we be TA if we asked about getting the gift back?”
The consensus from other Reddit users was loud in that nearly everyone agreed that the Reddit user and her husband would look like a**h*les should they ask for the gift back.
In an update, the Reddit user added that she and her husband decided they would listen to the advice of others and not ask for the gift back. “People have also commented on my tone and I just wanted to clarify that Jen is truly only my husband’s friend, not mine. Jen and my husband were close as kids but haven’t been close for years (before I ever came into the picture), sort of like a cousin you grew up with but only talk to at major holidays now.”
What are your thoughts on this?
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