Two months after her pregnancy loss, Christina Perri says she and her family are healing bit by bit, everyday.
In November, Perri, 34, revealed how she and husband Paul Costabile‘s baby had been “born silent.” Perri, who also suffered a miscarriage in January of 2020, wrote how her daughter “is at peace now and will live forever in our hearts.”
Perri, who has since deleted all of her Instagram posts, did share a photo on her Instagram Story last week of herself and Costabile walking on the beach with daughter Carmella Stanley, 3, informing her followers that “we’re healing. A tiny bit every day we take another step forward.”
“I keep describing grief as a house,” she continued.
“I live in this house now, I just go from room to room. paul and carmella are here in the grief house too. we are healing together and alone.”
Perri went on to write how watching her 3-year-old grieve “has been the hardest,” but added that she is “made of stars. she keeps lighting our darkness.”
“Some days we take 3 steps forward and some days we don’t move. love is guiding us. we keep facing the sun. we keep trying to be ok. we’re doing all the therapies and healing things someone can do. we know this is a long road. the messages and love we still receive every single day keep carrying us through. thank you.”
And two weeks after the heartbreaking news, Perri gave fans an update, writing in December that “we’re not ok, but we believe in a day we will be.”
“Me, paul, and carmella all wrap each other up in love and in sadness every day,” she said at the time. “We’re learning to navigate our grief together. some days we can’t swim, some days we float fine. every day we burst into tears and every day we find moments to laugh. it’s been all the feelings, all the emotions, all the questions, all the anger, all the sadness; all day long.”
Perri added how “some moments of surrender and hope slip in there, but not often,” adding that she understands “that’s all normal” in the grieving process.
“Honestly it’s been mostly overwhelming. but also, what’s been overwhelming has been the love and support,” she wrote. “The calls, texts, messages, emails, letters, flowers, packages, gifts, food, prayers, cards, stories and visits have been the greatest outpouring of love in my lifetime. yes, it’s been the worst experience of my life, but how bittersweet to also be the most loved i’ve ever felt at the same time. thank you.”
With a background in the creative and educational fields, Amelia Finefrock is freelance writer, singer-songwriter and nanny based in Chicago.
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