In an AITA (Am I The A***hole) on Reddit, one anonymous husband (OP) asked for the interwebs advice on his wife’s postpartum body and if she should be wearing a bikini.
“This Memorial Day, our family decided to have a small barbecue by our outdoor pool,” he shared in his post. “My wife gave birth to our youngest daughter seven months ago, and this is the first time our family has gotten to have fun together.”
“My sister (26) and my mother, who are both staying in our guesthouse, came over and [brought] my six-year-old nephew,” he wrote. He went on to share how everyone was having fun swimming “…when my wife walks out wearing a bikini.”
OP then notes it got “awkward” because everyone was seeing his wife’s body “for the first time” in her swimsuit.
“Everybody got a full view of her still pregnant looking stomach as well as very wrinkled and leathery-looking skin,” he added. OP went on to say how his wife went into the pool to play with their nephew when OP’s mom took him aside to speak to him.
“My mom whispers in my ear that a 40-year-old woman in a bikini looked tacky,” he shared. “And she brings up that my daughter was planning to post a family picture to Instagram.”
OP then noted how his daughter was worried about having a photo of her mom in a bikini on her social profile and used some hurtful language to describe the mom’s new body. The OP then decided to bring it up with his wife.
OP went on to share that he took his wife aside to speak to her about what she was wearing.
“I pull my wife aside and ask if she could change into non-pool going clothes or a one-piece” OP posted. “She flips out at me and starts explaining how this body gave me a precious baby and made a general scene. She then storms off and we end up having to take the picture without her.”
But this was not the first time the OP has shamed his wife’s body.
She has a total of three kids, her last one being born just seven months ago. And when the two spoke again, the wife allegedly brought up a past discussion that had to do with her getting a tummy tuck. He wrote:
“When the party ends, she brings up the old argument of when we suggested she get a tummy tuck from the plastic surgeon my sister used.” OP writes that his wife then called him a “misogynist” and he said he was “just objectively pointing out the fact that if she could have a stomach that is flatter.”
The OP then writes how his wife has moved her stuff out of their shared bedroom and is currently sleeping in the baby’s room and “ignoring” him.
Do you think he was in the right? Comment your thoughts below!
With a background in the creative and educational fields, Amelia Finefrock is freelance writer, singer-songwriter and nanny based in Chicago.