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QUESTION: My Ex Is Dating a Married Woman, and I Hate It for Several Reasons: Advice?
“My ex is currently dating a married girl who is lying to her husband. She has two boys.
My son goes over to his dad’s every other weekend. When my son is there, his dad continuously brings this girl around. My son does not like her. He tolerates her.
I hate it that my son has to basically beg for his dad’s attention when she is around. I don’t feel like she should be there interfering in the father-son time. Also, should I say anything to the husband?”
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Community Answers
The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.
“If you have physical proof i absolutely would tell the husband. The relationships he models in front of your child are the ones your child learns from.”
“Sounds like you’re looking for an excuse to cause drama. If your child isn’t in danger, let it go and move on.”
“I’m all mouth so everyone would be getting cussed out especially the married woman because if her husband found out and wanted to pay a visit to the ex’s house and the son is with him, it could end up on a dangerous situation. Play with my kids, you play with me and that’s on Mary had a little lamb.”
“Sooo everyone saying keep out of it. Her son goes to his house. What if the husband finds out and gets mad and shows up to his house and starts trouble. I wouldn’t want my kid around that.”
“Nope! Stay out of it. It will only make you look like you’re jealous. Unfortunately, there’s very little you can do about who he allows to be around your son. Unless you have proof they are doing something illegal or your son is in danger.”
“How is it none of her business? Her child is being put in a potentially dangerous situation. Imagine if her husband follows her one day and things erupt into a physical fight etc in the presence of her son. Do not pretend that these situations do not occur. Get real.”
“You need to mind your own business!! Also, instead of wanting to change something that is none of your business, teach your child how to handle this for themselves. It’s a life lesson. There are people that he will have in his life, that he doesn’t like. Coworkers, bosses, classmates, teachers, etc. That’s life. You don’t get to choose what his father does with his time. Teach your child to communicate feelings. Try that. Don’t try to control someone else’s life.”
“I’d tell the husband. But that’s just me. I’ve been cheated on before and I appreciated it when someone who knew told me.”
“It is her business if her son gets caught in the crossfire of a jealous husband and his dad put him there!! Don’t say ‘it can’t happen to me’ when it happens everyday. A mother does not have to tolerate an ex’s stupidity if it may endanger her son. I would feel the same if it was her involved with a married man!!!!”
“Unfortunately it’s none of your business who he dates or has in his house. As long as your child isn’t in danger professionals will say it’s none of your business.”
“Guess I’m the odd one out, but I’d let him know. Wouldn’t you hope that someone would extend the same courtesy to you if they knew your spouse was cheating?”
“Yeah, that’s a bad situation. I wouldn’t say anything to her husband. I wouldn’t want my child with him, when her husband finds out. Honestly I don’t think any new partners should be around the kids, until the relationship is serious. Clearly he’s not getting serious with a married woman, so I would talk to him about that at least.”
“Mind your own business, you don’t truly know the whole situation. I wouldn’t interfere with my kids dads relationships. Plus if you tell the husband she will probably end up moving in with your ex and will still be there so youre not changing anything and just causing all this drama.”
“Stay out of it! You will only cause more more problems for yourself! If your son is having problems with it then he needs to be able to talk to his dad about it! Give him guidance on how to approach his dad with the conversation.”
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