Jennifer Garner admits she neglects her children and she believes it’s good for them.
As Parents.com reports, Jennifer Garner practices a style of parenting known as “benign neglect” and it’s the opposite of “helicopter parenting.”
The actress explained her parenting style while talking with the hosts of the Today Show. When the topic of her three children, Violet, Seraphina, and Samuel, was brought up, Garner admitted that she “wants to be around” her children; however, she also believes not being around all the time is good for them.
“I want to be around. But I also think it’s OK if they suffer from a little bit of benign neglect,” Garner explains. “Their lives are their own. I’m not trying to live their life, and I don’t mind that they see that I love mine.”
Now, as Parents.com points out, this style of parenting “doesn’t advocate for true neglect” and it’s also dependent on the age of your children, but practicing benign neglect as a parent of older children is one many parents believe is the healthier choice, a choice that will ultimately give you educated and independent children.
“As a parent, I believe it is important to help children learn how to determine when assistance is truly needed, rather than looking to a parent to solve all of their problems and complete all tasks,” Tracee Perryman, PhD, author of Elevating Futures: A Model For Empowering Black Elementary Student Success, told Parents.
And Sanam Hafeez, PsyD, a neuropsychologist in New York and the Director of Comprehensive Consultation Psychological Services agrees, saying that “benign neglect” is a style of parenting that “involves nurturing independence in children.”
“It fosters an environment where kids are encouraged to explore, make choices, and solve problems independently, ultimately developing a sense of autonomy,” she continued, before adding that this style of parenting is “a balance between freedom and safety, ensuring that children have the space to grow while maintaining a secure environment.”
However, like with any style of parenting, “benign neglect” can be taken too far if a parent isn’t careful, Dr. Hafeez tells Parents.com. “Constantly prioritizing personal interests over family needs may convey that individual pursuits are more important than familial responsibilities. An overemphasis on personal interests may result in a lack of emotional connection between parents and children.”
The goal, as is with most things parenting, is to always find the “just-right” balance, Parents.com reports. What style of parenting do you prefer?