I Wasn't the Best Mom to My Girls Growing Up: How Should I Fix This?

I Wasn’t the Best Mom to My Girls Growing Up and I Want to Change, But They Keep Disrespecting Me: How Should I Fix This?

A mom writes in asking for advice now that she is trying to fix her relationship with her estranged daughters. The mom admitted that she wasn’t the best mom while they were growing up, but she has been trying her hardest as of late to fix their broken relationship. However, the mom said her daughters “are very disrespectful” towards her now. Now, she’s wondering if she should keep trying or just let their relationship stay where it is?

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A member of the community asks:

“I am seeking advice and anyone that can relate. I have two daughters that are somewhat estranged from me. I wasn’t the best mother when they were growing up, but I have tried to make up for it for years. They are very disrespectful to me when they are around.

One is an adult child, and the other chooses to live with her dad. It’s been mentally and emotionally draining to try to have a relationship with them. Do I set boundaries and stop the chase, live my life, or continue to try? Please advise a troubled mother.”

– Mamas Uncut Community Member

Community Advice for This Mom Who Is Struggling to Mend Her Relationship With Her Daughters

To see what advice the Mamas Uncut Facebook community has for this mom in need, read the comments of the post embedded below.

Fan QuestionI wasn't the best mom to my girls growing up: How should I fix this?I am seeking advice and anyone that…

Posted by Mamas Uncut on Monday, November 11, 2019

Advice Summary

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Many of the people offering advice told the mother to give her daughters some time. One commenter wrote, “Let them live their life. Take care of your mind and heart. They’ll come around.”

Another woman added, “In your post, the attitude I get from it is one of impatience. Depending on the level of “not the best mom you could be,” you may have to find a lot more patience. They don’t owe it to you to forgive you. If the things you have done are really severe than they may not forgive you. They do not owe you a relationship.”

And one mom said, “If they choose to come around, obviously they want to try having a relationship, but if it takes them longer, respect them till they are ready. That’s hard if you weren’t around when they needed you the most, so you have to understand why they choose not to have a relationship at the moment with you. They are already pretty much grown and learn things without having mom around. They are used to someone else’s love and care, so it must be hard for them to understand why mom couldn’t be around.”

Do you have any advice for this mom? Leave a comment to help another mom out!

Over on the Mamas Uncut Facebook page, our robust community of moms is always having a conversation about topics that matter. We like to highlight those conversations from time to time. Important mom questions. Thoughtful mom answers.

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