A mom writes in asking for advice. Her husband treats his son better than the rest of their other children. He will buy his son toys and snacks but doesn’t get their other two kids anything. When she confronts him he says sorry but never changes his actions. This really upsets this mom and she doesn’t know what to do. Any advice for this mom?
A member of the community asks:
“Is this something you would get irritated about, or am I over emotional about it? I work from home and care for a baby boy and physically disabled autistic toddler. I get paid weekly, and my husband is paid bi-weekly. By week two he’s usually broke, so I let him keep my bank card on him with plenty of cash on it. We share a vehicle, so my two children and I are home all day every day usually. My disabled son gets super excited about toys and snacks because he doesn’t get to do much, to be honest.
So my husband will pick up my step-son and buy him snacks, toys, and happy meals with my card and bring it home but not get our two children anything. My husband treats his son better than our other children. When my son asks him where his brother got a new toy or snack he’ll say “I don’t know!” I think this is really awful! He should get all of our children something, and there’s plenty of cash on my card.
It’s not fair guys, and it hurts my children, especially my older son! I’ve already talked to my husband about it, and he acted like he was sorry, but he’s still playing favorite with my step-son. When I get my children something, I always get my stepson something; he’s never left out. Do any of you have a husband who seems to play favorites with your step-child? I know it isn’t because we don’t see him much, we keep him more than his mother, usually all week.”
Community Advice for This Mom Struggling with Her Husband
To see what advice the Mamas Uncut Facebook community has for this mom in need, read the comments of the post embedded below.
Advice for this mom was all very supportive. Many felt that the husband is in the wrong if he treats his son better than the rest of the children. One shared, “It’s very shallow to treat any of your children differently. My stepdaughter never is treated differently than my two other children ever. It’s a package deal.”
Others told her to take her card back. one commented, “Take your card back. He is not being fair. Children notice things like this and it is hurtful for them. They will remember it for the rest of their lives” while another shared, “Your husband’s behavior is unacceptable and I would take that bank card back. What he is doing is emotional abuse.”
Another agreed and said, “I agree with you. This behavior isn’t fair at all. I would not give him the money I worked for to be able to buy extras for his son only. I would also explain again that I asked him not to do this and he has decided to continue so I have decided that his unfair behavior would not continue with my help.” One said, “If its expenses that he’s worried about in getting three of everything every time I’d talk to him and see if he’d be willing to get a treat for each of them at different times to make them all feel special.”
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