My 11-Year-Old Daughter Keeps Sabotaging All of My Relationships, What Should I Do About It?

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QUESTION: What Should I Do About My Daughter Sabotaging All Of My Relationships?

“I was divorced in 2019, mom of three. My 11-year-old daughter tried to sabotage all of my relationships since my divorce. Any advice?”

RELATED: Q&A: I Really Need Advice For My Daughter’s Behavior

My 11-Year-Old Daughter Keeps Sabotaging All of My Relationships, What Should I Do About It?

Community Answers

The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.

“Good man will stick around and an 11 year wouldn’t be able to sabotage anything. Also a good man will take time knowing your daughter needs it. Also spend time her and lots of bonding. Ask why she is not feeling happy with your relationships.”

“Date, but don’t bring them home to the kids.”

“Keep your romance and child separate.”

“You need to have a heart to heart talk with her. Tell her that you hate to say it but you marriage to her daddy is over and even tho you share children you share nothing else. To suck it up and except the fact that you and daddy are not in love with each other and that the both of you are going on with your own separate lives. Your daughter may need counseling.”

“I’ll bet she’s worried you’ll replace her too. Reassure her that even if you get married again and have other children that she is your first and will always be special and will always be loved. Go do some mother-daughter things together to build that bond. Find some good books & movies for her to help her cope as well as counseling.”

“Don’t tell your kids about your relationship unless you know it’s headed for marriage keep your dating life private.”

“My daughter tried to do the same thing with my current husband if the guy understands what he’s getting into it shouldn’t be a problem if he’s willing to deal with the bs that the kids will throw at him then he’s a keeper obviously none of the relationships were meant to be bc if they where they guy would have stuck thru whatever shes doing my daughter did some pretty horrible things when I finally did introduce my kids to him but he understood and stuck by me thru the tough time and now we are a happy blended family.”

“Simple. Don’t bring these guys around your kids till you’ve been dating for 6 months.”

“The right one will stay and wont let anyone 11 year old run them of. But stop introducing your kids to these guys. Don’t bring them over at all. She’s going through some things obviously so you should talk to her about it and get down to the real issue. Communication is key.”

“Don’t bring your boyfriends over to meet the kids keep those the kids away from potential partners you aren’t going to die if they don’t meet. Your main concern should be your daughters behavior. Maybe she needs something from you, you should ask her instead of pondering about it.”

“Unless you’ve been seeing someone for about a year…don’t bring them around your kids.”

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