i found out my ex was letting my 10-year-old daughter stay home alone: how would you handle this situation?

I Found Out my Ex Was Letting My 10-Year-Old Daughter Stay Home Alone: How Would You Handle This Situation?

A mom writes in asking for advice after she learned her ex-husband was allowing their 10-year-old daughter to stay home alone while she was in his custody. According to the mom, the father would take their 2-year-old with him but would leave their pre-teen daughter at home. Now she’s asking other parents how they would handle the situation as she does not believe her daughter is old enough to be left alone at home yet.

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A member of the community asks:

“I’m a mom of a 2-, 5-, and a 10-year-old. I’m in a shared custody agreement. I found out my ex was recently letting my daughter stay home alone at 10 years of age and taking my son with them when he goes out with no adult supervision. I’m gonna take it to court after taking to cas [SIC]. [Her] school [is] saying they won’t do much about this. He has we’d [SIC] and every other weekend. I’m having trouble with [the] schoolboard not letting me get them early because of my concerns about the safety of my kids since my ex refuses to talk to me about this. [He] has left her alone two times before this. What do my chances in court [look like] for sole custody?”

– Mamas Uncut Community Member

Community Advice for This Mom Who Is Upset That Her Ex-Husband Leaves Daughter Home Alone

To see what advice the Mamas Uncut Facebook community has for this mom in need, read the comments of the post embedded below.

Advice Summary

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While many parents seemed to understand her concern, they also don’t believe they should take him to court over this particular situation.

One commenter wrote, “Pick your battles. This is one you won’t win in court, possibly make you out to be the bad one actually, so I suggest coming to grips with your preteen being more independent.” And another person agreed, “I’m pretty certain each state has laws about what age a child is legally allowed to be home without adult supervision. Research your state first.”

One mom added, “It’s down to him as a parent to evaluate the situation when he has her. He obviously trusts her enough to leave her. It’s his watch as they [are] in his care. A few hours is fine. If your child is uncomfortable with it then she needs to speak to her dad herself about it. She’s old enough to have a conversation with him. I asked my 10-year-old if she wants to come with me and she says yes or no, so she stays home while I go shopping. She’s independent enough, she walks from school with friends, can go round to shop and use money herself. [She] goes out and plays with her friends. She knows not to answer doors just to ignore it. She sits in her room or watches TV, my two oldest ate in sometimes but not all they 15 [and] 13. But I take my 5-year-old.”

Do you have any advice for this mom? Leave a comment to help another mom out!

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