100 Best Relationship Quotes

Our relationships define our lives. From the love from our parents as children to friendships we foster to romantic relationships, many of these bonds will last a lifetime. It’s not all roses and fun. Relationships are complex. We all have had our share of bad breakups, both romantically and with friendships that unfortunately dissolve. Our relationships are also extremely important because they teach us so much about ourselves. Relationship quotes can help us put words to emotions we might not fully understand or remark on why forging strong ties is essential to a happy life.

We decided to round up a bunch of relationship quotes that will empower you to find the words to say in various situations. You might be looking for the best way to say “I love you” to a friend or romantic interest, a quote about relationships falling apart, or even a sentiment to help you grieve the loss of a relationship. We turn to the words of great thinkers, poets, writers, and artists to help us better understand and express ourselves more fully. Find some of the very best below.

Stirring Relationship Quotes

“If she happens to fall, I’ll be there to laugh at first and then help her up afterwards.” — J.A. Redmerski
“Love is sharing your popcorn.” — Charles Schultz
“Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.” — Erma Bombeck
“An archaeologist is the best husband any woman can have; the older she gets the more interested he is in her.” — Agatha Christie

Robust Relationship Quotes

“All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.” — Charles M. Schulz
“I say if you love something, set it in a small cage and pester and smother it with love until it either loves you back or dies.” — Mindy Kaling
“Love is the same as like except you feel sexier.” — Judith Viorst
“A girl can wait for the right man to come along but in the meantime that doesn’t mean she can’t have a wonderful time with all the wrong ones.” — Cher

Bold Relationship Quotes

“True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked.” — Erich Segal
“True love is like ghosts, which everyone talks about and few have seen.” — François de la Rochefoucauld
“It wasn’t love at first sight. It took a full five minutes.” — Lucille Ball
“Marriage is like vitamins: we supplement each other’s minimum daily requirements.” — Kathy Mohnke

Contemplative Relationship Quotes

“I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks.” — Steven Martin
“Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties.” — Jules Renard
“Love is a two-way street constantly under construction.” — Carroll Bryant
“Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell.” — Joan Crawford

Evergreen Relationship Quotes

“Love conquers all things except poverty and toothache.” — Mae West
“The best way to get most husbands to do something is to suggest that perhaps they’re too old to do it.” — Shirley MacLaine
“Love is a lot like a backache: it doesn’t show up on X-rays, but you know it’s there.” — George Burns
“You can’t put a price tag on love, but you can on all its accessories.” — Melanie Clark

Clever Relationship Quotes

“A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days.” — Tim Allen
“If you love them in the morning with their eyes full of crust; if you love them at night with their hair full of rollers, chances are, you’re in love.” — Miles Davis
“If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?” — Lily Tomlin
“Being a good husband is like being a stand-up comic. You need 10 years before you can call yourself a beginner.” — Jerry Seinfeld

Brilliant Relationship Quotes

“Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet service to see who they really are.” — Will Ferrell
“I love being married. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” — Rita Rudner
“Sexy is the thing I try to get them to see me as after I win them over with my personality.” — Miranda, Sex and the City
“I miss crawling into a man’s arm, kissing his neck, saying those three little words into his ear, ‘And another thing…’” — Felicia Michaels

Powerful Relationship Quotes

“Life without love is like a tree without blossoms or fruit.” — Khalil Gibran
“Keep love in your heart. A life without it is like a sunless garden when the flowers are dead.” — Oscar Wilde
“Love is a friendship set to music.” — Joseph Campbell
“My heart is, and always will be, yours.” — Jane Austen

Meaningful Relationship Quotes

“I love you. I am at rest with you. I have come home.” — Dorothy L. Sayers
“Loved you yesterday, love you still, always have, always will.” — Elaine Davis
“You know you’re in love when you don’t want to fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.” — Dr. Seuss
“A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous.” — Ingrid Bergman

Fulfilling Relationship Quotes

“You don’t love someone for their looks, or their clothes, or for their fancy car, but because they sing a song only you can hear.” — Oscar Wilde
“I want you. All of you. Your flaws. Your mistakes. Your imperfections. I want you, and only you.” — John Legend
“When I saw you, I was afraid to meet you. When I met you I was afraid to kiss you. When I kissed you, I was afraid to love you. Now that I love you, I am afraid to lose you.” — Unknown
“But I love you I’m totally and completely in love with you and I don’t care if you think it’s too late. I’m telling you anyway.” — Natalie Portman

Heartfelt Relationship Quotes

“I’m much more me when I’m with you.” — Unknown
“I saw that you were perfect, and so I loved you. Then I saw that you were not perfect and I loved you even more.” — Angelita Lim
“You are my best friend, my human dairy, and my other half. You mean the world to me and I love you.” — Unknown
“If I know what love is, it is because of you.” — Herman Hesse

Charming Relationship Quotes

“Sometimes the heart sees what is invisible to the eye.” — H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
“Love is sharing your popcorn.” — Charles Schultz
“I would rather spend one lifetime with you, than face all the ages of this world alone.” — J.R.R. Tolkien
“I choose you. And I’ll choose you over and over and over. Without pause, without a doubt, in a heartbeat. I’ll keep choosing you.” — Unknown

Bright Relationship Quotes

“True love stories never have endings.” — Richard Bach
“I love you the more in that I believe you had liked me for my own sake and for nothing else.” — John Keats
“There is only one happiness in this life, to love and be loved.” — George Sand
“A flower cannot blossom without sunshine, and man cannot live without love.” — Max Muller

Promising Relationship Quotes

“Once upon a time there was a boy who loved a girl, and her laughter was a question he wanted to spend his whole life answering.” — Nicole Krauss
“The best and most beautiful things in this world cannot be seen or even heard — they must be felt with the heart.” — Helen Keller
“At the touch of love everyone becomes a poet.” — Plato
“Nobody has ever measured, not even poets, how much the heart can hold.” — Zelda Fitzgerald

Auspicious Relationship Quotes

“If I had a flower for every time I thought of you… I could walk through my garden forever.” — Alfred Tennyson
“I was born when you kissed me. I died when you left me. I lived a few weeks while you loved me.” — Humphrey Bogart
“I love her and that’s the beginning and end of everything.” — F. Scott Fitzgerald
“Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same.” — Emily Brontë

Reassuring Relationship Quotes

“Love is the beginning of the journey, its end, and the journey itself.” — Deepak Chopra
“I still haven’t figured out how to sit across from you, and not be madly in love with everything you do.” — William C. Hannan
“It was love at first sight, at last sight, at ever and ever sight.” — Vladimir Nabokov
“You might not have been my first love, but you were the love that made all other loves irrelevant.” — Rupi Kaur

Encouraging Relationship Quotes

“The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in.” — Morrie Schwartz
“I want you to know that I’m not like the women in your past. I see the real you, and I wake up every day excited to know more about you.” — Barrie Davenport
“When I saw you, I fell in love, and you smiled because you knew it.” — Arrigo Boito
“You make me feel like I am everywhere when I am right here, completely still with you.” — Crystal Woods

Positive Relationship Quotes

“I look at you and see the rest of my life in front of my eyes” — Unknown
“For you see, each day I love you more, today more than yesterday and less than tomorrow.” — Rosemonde Gérard
“When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.” — Harry Burns
“Love is when you meet someone who tells you something new about yourself.” — Andrew Breton

Boosting Relationship Quotes

“In the end there doesn’t have to be anyone who understands you. There just has to be someone who wants to.” — Robert Brault
“Let us always meet each other with smile, for the smile is the beginning of love.” — Mother Teresa
“When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.” — Maya Angelou
“Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.” — Albert Einstein

Nurturing Relationship Quotes

“Have enough courage to trust love one more time and always one more time.”— Maya Angelou
“I’m selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can’t handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don’t deserve me at my best.” — Marilyn Monroe
“There is no remedy for love but to love more.” — Henry David Thoreau
“Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable.” — Bruce Lee

Rousing Relationship Quotes

“To fall in love is to create a religion that has a fallible god.” — Jorge Luis Borges
“In a relationship each person should support the other; they should lift each other up.” — Taylor Swift
“We’ve got this gift of love, but love is like a precious plant. You can’t just accept it and leave it in the cupboard or just think it’s going to get on by itself. You’ve got to keep watering it. You’ve got to really look after it and nurture it.” — John Lennon
“The times may have changed, but the people are still the same. We’re still looking for love, and that will always be our struggle as human beings.” — Halle Berry

Stimulating Relationship Quotes

“I don’t miss you and you alone — I miss you and me together.” — Unknown
“If love cannot stand the test of time, then it has failed the test of love.” — Bernard Byer
“Distance is not for the fearful, it is for the bold. It’s for those who are willing to spending a lot of time alone in exchange for a little time with the one they love. It’s for those knowing a good thing when they see it, even if they don’t see it nearly enough.” — Meghan Daum
“I carry your heart with me (I carry it in my heart.)” — E.E. Cummings

Remarkable Relationship Quotes

“The best thing to hold onto in life is each other.” — Audrey Hepburn
“How lucky I am to have something that makes saying good by so hard.” — A.A. Milne, Winnie The Pooh
“Absence sharpens love, presence strengthens it.” — Thomas Fuller
“Distance teaches us to appreciate the days that we are able to spend together and distance teaches us the definition of patience. It is a reminder that every moment together is special, and every second should be cherished.” — Unknown

Stand Out Relationship Quotes

“It is only when we no longer compulsively need someone that we can have a real relationship with them.” — Anthony Storr
“If you love someone, set them free. If they come back they’re yours; if they don’t they never were.” — Richard Bach
“You know it’s love when all you want is that person to be happy, even if you’re not part of their happiness.” — Julia Roberts
“Love takes off masks that we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within.” — James Baldwin

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Our Favorite Relationship Quotes

“Treasure your relationships, not your possessions.” — Anthony J. D’Angelo
“People should fall in love with their eyes closed.” — Andy Warhol
“The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is to love and be loved in return.” — Natalie Cole
“You don’t love someone because they’re perfect, you love them in spite of the fact that they’re not.” — Jodi Picoult

There you go! We hope you found some of these relationship quotes to be as moving as we did. There is much to say about them, and these great thinkers nailed it. If you want even more quotes, keep reading. We’ve got some funny love quotes to share with you!

You’re Going to Get a Kick Out of These Funny Love Quotes!

Spot-On Funny Love Quotes

“Love is being stupid together.” – Paul Valery
“Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell.” – Joan Crawford
“Men are from Earth. Women are from Earth. Deal with it.” – George Carlin
“Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties.” – Jules Renard
“Love can change a person the way a parent can change a baby- awkwardly, and often with a great deal of mess.” – Lemony Snicket

Funny Love Quotes About Marriage

“The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.” – Henry Youngman
“As a man in a relationship, you have a choice: You can be right or you can be happy.” – Ralphie May
“By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.” – Socrates
“Marriage is a lot like the army, everyone complains, but you’d be surprised at the large number that re-enlist.” – James Garner
“Marriage is like twirling a baton, turning a handspring or eating with chopsticks; it looks easy until you try it.” – Helen Rowland

Charming Funny Love Quotes

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“Real love amounts to withholding the truth, even when you’re offered the perfect opportunity to hurt someone’s feelings.” – David Sedaris
“When a couple is arguing over who loves who more, the one that gives up is the real winner.” – Unknown
“Marriage is not just spiritual communion and passionate embraces; marriage is also three-meals-a-day and remembering to carry out the trash.” – Joyce Brothers
“I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the time he killed himself.” – Johnny Carson
“Love doesn’t drop on you unexpectedly; you have to give off signals, sort of like an amateur radio operator.” – Helen Gurley Brown

Relatable Funny Love Quotes

“Love; A temporary insanity curable by marriage.” – Ambrose Bierce
“I kissed my first girl and smoked my first cigarette on the same day. I haven’t had time for tobacco since.” – Arturo Toscanini
“In love, somehow, a man’s heart is always either exceeding the speed limit or getting parked in the wrong place.” – Rowland
An archaeologist is the best husband any woman can have; the older she gets the more interested he is in her. – Agatha Christie
Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age – as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight. – Phyllis Diller

Funny Love Quotes You’ll Want to Frame

“I love you and it’s getting worse.” – Joseph E. Morris
“Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed.” – Albert Einstein
“I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.” – David Bissonette
“Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood.” – Oscar Wilde
“People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.” – Bob Hope

Memorable Funny Love Quotes

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“If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?” – Lilly Tomlin
“Love is like a tornado, picks you up off your feet and sometimes takes half your house.” – Unknown
“Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you’re in.” – Richard Jeni
“Romantic love is mental illness. But it’s a pleasurable one.” – Fran Lebowitz
“True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked.” – Erich Segal

Exhilarating Funny Love Quotes

“Love is much nicer to be in than an automobile accident, a tight girdle, a higher tax bracket, or a holding pattern over Philadelphia.” – Judith Viorst
“They say that love is more important than money, but have you ever tried to pay your bills with a hug?” – Unknown
“We’re like Romeo & Juliet… Except for the dying part of course.” – Justina
“Love is like finding a needle in a haystack.” – FaithHopeNLove
“Love is not having to hold in your farts anymore.” – Bree Luckey

Funny Love Quotes That Get It

“You can’t put a price tag on love. But if you could, I’d wait for it to go on sale.” – Hussein Nishah
“In any perfect relationship men should remember it’s a matter of direction; she takes what’s right and you take what’s left.” – Solitaire Parke
“My wife and I were happy for 20 years – then we met.” – Rodney Dangerfield
“Love is a sweet dream and marriage is the alarm clock.” – Jewish Proverb
“The key to a successful relationship is to clear your internet history.” – Quoteistan

Endearing Funny Love Quotes

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“Love is an electric blanket with somebody else in control of the switch.” – Cathy Carlyle
“The more she turned right the more I turned wrong.” – Mark W. Boyer
“If only one could tell true love from false love as one can tell mushrooms from toadstools.” – Katherine Mansfield
“Love is blind but marriage is a real eye-opener.” – Pauline Thomason
“Marriage is a great institution for those who like institutions.” – Tommy Dewar

Special Funny Love Quotes

“Women love a self-confident bald man.” – Larry David
“My last love is just like that thong Peter Griffin borrowed from me… Never getting it back.” – Refinnej Sin
“If she happens to fall, I’ll be there to laugh at first and then help her up afterward.” – J.A. Redmerski
“I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.” – Steven Wright
“I went to a meeting for premature ejaculators. I left early.” – Jack Benny

Smashing Funny Love Quotes

“My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on.” – Joan Rivers
“My brother is gay and my parents don’t care, as long as he marries a doctor.” – Elayne Boosler
“My wife was afraid of the dark… then she saw me naked and now she’s afraid of the light.” – Rodney Dangerfield
“Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings and lawyers.” – Richard Pryor
“Love is a lot like a backache: it doesn’t show up on X-rays, but you know it’s there.” – George Burns

Engaging Funny Love Quotes

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“My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don’t really know me.” – Garry Shandling
“Love is telling someone their hair extensions are showing.” – Natasha Leggero
“I love being married. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” – Rita Rudner
“Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet service to see who they really are.” – Will Ferrell
“People should fall in love with their eyes closed.” – Andy Warhol

Refreshing Funny Love Quotes

“I love you no matter what you do, but do you have to do so much of it?” – Jean Illsley Clarke
“I love you so much I’d fight a bear for you. Well, not a grizzly bear because they have claws, and not a panda bear because they know Kung Fu. But a carebear, I’d definitely fight a carebear for you.” – Unknown
“Love is fun but, it is not going to pay the bills.” – Jessica Martin
“True love is like ghosts, which everyone talks about and few have seen.” – Francois de la Rochefoucauld
“A man in love is not complete until he is married. Then he is finished.” – Zsa Zsa Gabor

Sensational Funny Love Quotes

“My phone battery lasts longer than most of my relationships nowadays.” – Unknown
“Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place.” – Billy Crystal
“Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand.” – Unknown
“My wife gets all the money I make. I just get an apple and clean clothes every morning.” – Ray Romano
“There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.” – Chris Rock

Grand Funny Love Quotes

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“If you can stay in love for more than two years, you’re on something.” – Fran Lebowitz
“I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.” – Groucho Marx
“Obviously, if I was serious about having a relationship with someone long-term, the last people I would introduce him to would be my family.” – Chelsea Handler
“Being a good husband is like being a stand-up comic. You need 10 years before you can call yourself a beginner.” – Jerry Seinfeld
“If you text ‘I love you’ to a person and the person writes back an emoji — no matter what that emoji is, they don’t love you back.” – Chelsea Peretti

Exceptional Funny Love Quotes

“It wasn’t love at first sight. It took a full five minutes.” – Lucille Ball
“I thought I was promiscuous, but it turns out I was just thorough.” – Russell Brand
“Love is the only kind of fire which is never covered by insurance.” – Unknown
“A man falls in love through his eyes, a woman through her ears.” – Les Dawson
“I had a dream that I still loved you. I think I woke up screaming.” – Unknown

Great Funny Love Quotes

“Love is a two-way street constantly under construction.” – Carroll Bryant
“I want someone who will pause his game just to answer my call.” – Unknown
“Loss for words? Give that person a hug. It’s worth a thousand and more. Plus, it’s free.” – Unknown
“A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.” – Unknown
“Love doesn’t make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.” – Franklin P. Jones

Funny Love Quotes That Feel Essential

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“When you’re in love, it’s the most glorious two-and-a-half days of your life.” – Richard Lewis
“Love with old men is as the sun upon the snow, it dazzles more than it warms.” – J. P. Senn
“If you love ’em in the morning with their eyes full of crust; if you love ’em at night with their hair full of rollers, chances are, you’re in love.” – Miles Davis
“All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.” – Charles M. Schulz
“I love you more than coffee, but please don’t make me prove it.” – Elizabeth Evans

Even More Funny Love Quotes

“What’s the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? About 30 pounds.” – Cindy Garner
“Love is a mutual self-giving which ends in self-recovery.” – Fulton J. Sheen
“Marrying a man is like buying something you’ve been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn’t always go with everything else.” – Jean Kerr
“Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.” – Albert Einstein
“Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.” – Jackie Mason

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Final Funny Love Quotes

“He gave her a look that you could have poured on a waffle.” – Ring Lardner
“Love is sharing your popcorn.” – Charles Schultz
“Marriage is like vitamins: we supplement each other’s minimum daily requirements.” – Kathy Mohnke
“What’s the best way to have your husband remember your anniversary? Get married on his birthday.” – Cindy Garner
“Marriage is like a bank account. You put it in, you take it out, you lose interest.” – Professor Irwin Corey

Wow! Aren’t these funny love quotes relatable? We hope you enjoyed these quotes and will share them with those who need a little cheering up. Every relationship has its ups and downs but we don’t have to take everything so seriously. These quotes lighten the mood and help us see things from a new perspective.

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