One dad posted to Reddit’s AITA forum asking for advice on becoming a parent while also asking if he should cut off his own in the process. The OP revealed he was struggling to become a parent and sought out his parent’s money to help with IVF.
And overall, it did not go as he had planned and is currently looking for advice on if cutting his mother out of his life is the right move. He reveals how he and his wife had been trying to get pregnant for a year but has not had much luck.
“So my wife made an appointment with her doctor and found out that there’s a 99.9% chance that she’ll not be able to conceive naturally and that IVF is our best and only real option,” he wrote.
“So we started looking into the cost of that, and we cannot swing it with our own money, we just bought a house together. We don’t have any extra spending money, though we both have great jobs.”
The OP went on to reveal if she could help pay for IVF as she did the exact same for his sisters when they also struggled to get pregnant.
“So I decided I’d go to my mother and ask her if she would pay for it or loan us the money because she paid for my older sister to have IVF done 2 years ago. She laughed in my face,” OP wrote.
“Told me she only paid for my sisters because that’s her real daughter and that my girlfriend should ask her mom (she knows she passed away, she was being a smart ass).” He then wrote,
“She suggested I find another wife that has a ‘working reproductive system.'”
OP then reveals how his parents would financially be able to help but believes their refusal is something that does beyond the dislike of his spouse.
“Keep in mind, my parents are very wealthy people,” OP said. “I know they can afford it and it wouldn’t make a dent in their wallet. They just don’t want to help us. She’s always had some personal vendetta against my wife (dare I say it’s because she’s not fully white?).”
He added, “So I told them I was done with them, that the comments they made were disgusting and that they SHOULD be treating my wife like she’s their daughter. That this is for me as well and that it’s bulls–t.”
The OP then reveals how his family members, as well as friends, were actually pinning the blaming on him.
“Family friends are now siding with my parents, saying that they understand why she’d pay for my sisters IVF but not mine and my wife’s,” he explained. “AITA for cutting them off for refusing to help us when they helped my sister?”
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With a background in the creative and educational fields, Amelia Finefrock is freelance writer, singer-songwriter and nanny based in Chicago.