Whitney Port, mom to two-year-old Sonny Sanford, recently opened up more about her miscarriage experience on the season finale of The Hills: New Beginnings. She and her husband, Tim Rosenman, had initially shared the news on her podcast, With Whit.
Port opened up to Kaitlynn Carter, who also appears on the show, about losing her second child during her pregnancy.
Port told Carter that she experienced “really strong symptoms” during both pregnancies, but that during her second, the symptoms suddenly stopped. Soon after, she learned that she had miscarried and continues to struggle emotionally as she deals with the loss.
“The grief is all-consuming. It’s all you can think about,” Port confessed during the episode. “It’s like a death is happening inside your body, and you’re also supposed to show up for you child that you have and you can’t really be sad in front of them, and you’re just confused if your feelings are ok or if they’re too dramatic.”
Port told Carter that she’s struggled to talk to people about it because she was already having mixed feelings about having a second child.
She and her husband are considering trying again, but Port admitted that she’s not sure she’ll ever feel the moment when she just knows she ready for another child.
“This is definitely one of the more difficult things I’ve ever gone through. The thought of the death of something that you haven’t met yet…it feels silly, but it’s not, because it’s you,” Port said. “It’s a part of the love you have with your husband and it’s just heartbreaking.”
Related: Whitney Port Once Turned Down a Date with Leonardo DiCaprio!
When I’m not hanging out with my three-year-old and husband in Brooklyn, I’m busy writing stories for Mamas Uncut and managing PR + Marketing for Magnolia Bakery, based in New York City. On weekends, you can usually find me at a local park or playground pushing my daughter on the swings, “researching” the best almond croissants in Park Slope or launching into impromptu family dance parties at home, the sidewalk or, every once in awhile, a restaurant bathroom. I’m still trying to master the whole parenting thing, but I have learned that copious amounts of coffee, humor and humility are involved on a daily basis.
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