A wife writes in asking for advice after her husband said he refuses to stop talking to his friend who’s a girl because she’s like a sister to him. The woman explains that her first marriage ended because her ex-husband was cheating on her with “just friends” or girls who are “like sisters” to him. She also admits that she doesn’t trust her current husband’s friend. Do you have any advice for this concerned wife?
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A member of the community asks:
“I have a question. My husband, who I’ve been with for almost a year, has a friend who is a girl that he claims is like a sister to him, but she is not blood-related at all. I don’t like her or even trust her at all. He has been talking to her behind my back while he’s at work.
How I know this is, yes, I got his phone and saw she was the last person he spoke to on messenger. I asked him, ‘Why are [you] talking to her?’ I said, ‘You know I don’t like her or even trust her and I don’t want you talking to her.’ And he said to me, ‘Well, I’m sorry, she is like a sister to me, and you are gonna have to get over it because I am going to continue talking to her.’
This is my second marriage. I went through something similar to this with my ex-husband of 16 years before I divorced him. I feel like my ex-husband would talk to other girls and say, ‘Oh they’re just friends or like sisters’ to him, then it escalated to more. What would [you all] do in this kind of situation. Should I go put in for a divorce from my new husband, or what? I just don’t want the same thing happening to me that I went through for 16 years.”
– Mamas Uncut Community Member
Community Advice for This Wife Who Doesn’t Want to Go Through the Same Thing Twice
To see what advice the Mamas Uncut Facebook community has for this mom in need, read the comments of the post embedded below.
Advice Summary
There were a lot of mixed reactions to this wife’s particular problem. Here are a few comments from the post above.
One commenter wrote, “You might be a bit sensitive, but you have to put your spouse first. They have to be 100% invested from both sides so you get the final call and so does he or it won’t work. Time for a dining table sit down. Good luck.”
Another person said, “It all comes down to respect. [If] you don’t like it, he needs to stop talking to her. End of story, also if your gut is telling you something, listen to it.”
And one woman added, “If you trust him then it shouldn’t be a problem. You should be able to have male friends and he should be able to have female friends. There has to be a level of trust and respect in a relationship and if it’s not there then you shouldn’t be together.”
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