A mom writes in asking for advice about whether she should leave her children unsupervised. She says her husband wants her to leave their three kids — ages 1, 2, and 6 — alone for short spells of time, but this idea makes her anxious and uncomfortable for a variety of reasons.
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A member of the community asks:
“When should kids be left unsupervised?
How young is too young to be left alone? My kids are 1,2,6. My husband thinks leaving our kids in a room and leaving the room is fine. He will play on his video games. He will tell me to leave the room and take a break that his parents did it to him, and he turned out fine. My youngest bites, my middle child has a sensory disorder. I don’t think it a good idea, and we argue about it constantly.
I believe we could do dishes while they play…but leaving the room for half hr is too much. He also thinks on family dinner nights with his family to allow the kids to be unsupervised. I am called the helicopter means parent because I won’t allow the kids by themselves in a room. One kid bullies my kids at the gatherings, and his parents don’t give him repercussions for his actions. He elbows my kids in the face, and his parent acts like it’s my kid’s fault, or they just say don’t do it. He’s very aggressive. What should I do? I’ve threatened not to go over there, but my husband will tell me he will take the kids and leave me at home.
I’m scared my kids will get hurt. My youngest can’t even talk…he picks on him the most because of it. I’ve had to tell him to go to his mother, and he couldn’t play with us, which led to a fight with my husband and me. He always takes their side over mine.”
– Mamas Uncut Community Member
Community Advice for This Mom Who Wants to Know if She Should Leave Her Kids Unsupervised
To see what advice the Mamas Uncut Facebook community has for this mom in need, read the comments of the post embedded below.
Advice Summary
The community offered this mom in need a lot of great advice. Read some of their responses below.
“Your husband is the fourth child it sounds like! Sheesh.”
“I wouldn’t say they’re too young. But with age combinations, the biting, and the sensory issues I wouldn’t leave them all alone together.”
“Six is fine, one- and two-year-old far too young.”
“Being a helicopter mom is fine especially for your younger children. I agree with the previous comment. Your husband is the fourth child and the bully. Stay in there, mom. You will never regret it.”
“Depends what they’re doing in the room. I didn’t follow my kids around 24/7 and left them either alone or alone together in rooms their entire lives but again it depended on what they were doing. (My kids are 16, 8, 9 and the younger 2 are boys and super rough with each other at times. Always have been. Probably always will be.)”
“I’m the odd man out: they are fine. Is he leaving them in the bathtub alone? Is that room baby-proofed? If not then …. do it…. then they can be left alone. Problem solved.”
“Your husband is wrong on every level.”
“6 yr old fine for short periods… 1 and 2-year-old?!? NO WAY! Way too many things could go wrong, and 6yr old should not be given the responsibility of keeping the other two safe- not the child’s job.”
“That’s a lot of issues. Mine are one and three, we do not leave them alone ever. Like in the kitchen and they are in the living room, but it’s all connected! If we are at anyone else’s house, we DO NOT ever let them out of our sight.”
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