my boyfriend tells me how to parent my kids and i hate it: any advice?

My Boyfriend Tells Me How to Parent My Kids and I Hate it: Any Advice?

A mom writes in asking for advice. Her boyfriend keeps trying to tell her how to parent her kids and she hates it. Her children are from past relationships, and even though he helps out a lot, he doesn’t respect her kids much. One instance about eating meat has put them into a continuous argument and this mom doesn’t know what to do. Any advice for her?

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A member of the community asks:

“I have three children from previous relationships and I am now dating this guy. My kids call him dad, and he has stepped up tremendously. However, I have an issue, and I’m not sure if I’m overreacting or what. I feel that he doesn’t respect my kids. My middle child, who is four-years-old, refuses to eat meat. He says it makes him sad that it’s an animal. I feel like it’s his body and I’m not going to force him to eat something like that if he chooses not to.

However, he doesn’t get anything else to eat. My boyfriend thinks I need to force him to eat it. He says he’s a child and doesn’t get to make choices like that. He feels that because he’s just a child, he needs to do as we say. I’m so lost on this topic. We fight about it constantly, and I just don’t know what to do anymore.”

– Mamas Uncut Community Member

Community Advice for This Mom Confused and Upset

To see what advice the Mamas Uncut Facebook community has for this mom in need, read the comments of the post embedded below.

Advice Summary

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Lots of advice for this mom supported her opinion over her boyfriend’s. One shared, “My pediatrician told me there are only 2 things kids can control. What they eat and when and where they use the restroom. Leave him alone. He is your son. Tell your boyfriend you respect his opinion, but you do not agree with him and will not be forcing him to eat meat.”

Most commenters thought that because he is the boyfriend and not the father, he cannot tell you how to parent your kids, nor has a say in the matter. One said, “First of all he doesn’t have any say in this they are your children. Don’t let him tell you how to raise your kids. He just wants to be in control.” Another agreed, “Your kid, your rules, your choice.”

One mom commented with her personal experience and some awesome helpful advice. She commented, “I hated meat as a kid, but my parents forced me to eat it. It did me no favors. I dreaded meals, and even my mom admits that she shouldn’t have forced me to eat it. You can get protein elsewhere. Meat is not essential for survival. I still don’t care for it much.” She continues, “Also, it’s great that your boyfriend has stepped up to the plate. Mine has done the same, but when it comes down to it, you are their parent. You get the final say. Don’t let him push you around. You don’t want your kid to hate mealtime.”

Do you have any advice for this mom? Leave a comment to help another mom out!

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