A mom writes in asking for advice about taking her son to church. She says she wants to take her son to church because he is “struggling with life and wants to go and see what it’s all about.” However, this mom’s husband has said she cannot take their son to church and is incredibly, incredibly adamant that she never does so. Should she take her son to church without her husband’s permission?
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A member of the community asks:
“My spouse says he won’t take our son to church: Should I take him? If your spouse says you can not take HIS kids (they’re yours biologically as well!!) to church and goes on and on about it, but your son is struggling with life and wants to go and see what it’s all about, does that make me wrong for wanting to take him?
I thought about going on my own in the past, but I always felt like I would have to do it in secret. Please weigh in on marriages with different religions or no religion. And who really says what goes when one person is hellbound determined that it can’t be any other way.”
– Mamas Uncut Community Member
Community Advice for This Mom Who Wants to Take Her Son to Church Against Her Husband’s Wishes
To see what advice the Mamas Uncut Facebook community has for this mom in need, read the comments of the post embedded below.
Advice Summary
The community offered this mom in need a lot of great advice. Read some of their responses below.
“Nonreligious household her: if our kids ever show an interest or curiosity in religion we would be happy to teach them about it and/or take them to a church they would like to check out. We would never push our beliefs (or nonbeliefs) on anyone, including our kids! And we want to encourage questions and curiosities of all kinds! I would take the dad’s feelings into consideration but I think you and he need to have a pretty serious talk to come up with an agreement on how it should be introduced to your son in a way you’re both comfortable with.”
“Religion should be a personal choice. No one should be forced into one they did not choose or be denied one they want to seek. Taking him to church may find the answers he seeks or it may not, but you’ll never know if the answer to his problems could have been this simple if you don’t try. He is his own person and has a right to find his own answers, wherever those may be. Trying to stop him from doing so will just cause him to resent you.”
“Your children have the right to choose which religion they want to follow, but in order to do that, they must be exposed to both so that they know what they are picking. You both have to be open-minded about this and not influence the children’s decision or question why they picked it, in any way.”
“My SO isn’t religious at all. I was raised Catholic and went to private school. He didn’t have any problem with us Baptising our kids or me taking them to church because he knows it’s important to me. He just doesn’t go with us to weekly services.”
“I’m agnostic, my husband is atheist. My daughter got curious. We let her go with her best friend. She enjoys it. I told her I’m not able to answer her questions very well but that I would do my best to find someone else who might be able to. We’re a happy family. Nobody’s beliefs interfere with anybody else’s here. We just coexist and love one another.”
“If the kid wants to go, take him. Your husband is being unreasonable. And this is coming from someone who very much dislikes the church for many reasons and is definitely NOT religious.”
“If he wants to go, take him. My mom forced us to go and I hated it. I’m giving my kids the option of being religious, nonreligious or seeking a different religion.”
“I grew up in a split household when it came to religion. My parents encouraged any curiosity I had. I do the same with my kids. I have one child that goes to a church of Christ and another that goes to Methodist and is close to his Baptism. I let them decide what is comfortable for them. My youngest has not made that decision yet and her father is Jewish. So as of right now, we choose nondenominational for her until she can choose for herself.”
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