A mom and ex-wife took to Reddit to ask other users if she’s an a**hole for telling her ex-husband’s soon-to-be ex-wife that she and her daughter will have nothing to do with her once the divorce is finalized.
According to the mom, her “ex-husband cheated on me with his current wife. We divorced, they got together and had a baby.” Now, years later, the husband cheated again, this time on his current wife and now they are getting a divorce.
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“He and his wife are getting a divorce, and he’s probably going to marry his new affair partner within the next 6 months if he follows the pattern,” the Reddit user wrote. “More power to him and his penis, I literally do not care what he does with his life anymore.”
And while her ex-husband’s behavior didn’t surprise her, his soon-to-be ex-wife’s behavior did.
“I was pretty shocked to discover that his wife reached out to me, basically crying about what happened, how she couldn’t believe it, and how now that we’re in the same camp, so to speak, we should maintain a relationship so our daughters can still be in each other’s lives and so we can commiserate.”
But that didn’t sit well with her and she admitted that she told her ex-husband’s second wife “to take a hike.” However, if their “mutual ex” happened to want their daughters to hang out at any given time, she said she would be more “than happy to schedule his visitation at the same time as hers so the girls could be together with their father.”
Nonetheless, “there was no way I was setting up sleepovers and playdates with her,” the Reddit user said. “I’m not bitter about it anymore, I’m remarried, etc. But I just want nothing to do with her. Haven’t since the affair.” But the second wife didn’t handle the first wife’s honest all that well.
“She about lost it, crying even more about how I would keep our girls apart because we both know ex-husband barely keeps up with his visitation, blah blah, and how he gets when he’s in a new relationship. Yes, NOW we both know. But before only I knew, and she didn’t seem too sympathetic about my end. She brought up how when she started up with my ex, she didn’t know he was married, so I shouldn’t hold it against her, and he’s the one who cheated, not her. But I really don’t care about any of that.”
In the end, according to the mom, the second wife ended up calling her an a**hole and now she’s wondering if she was too harsh.
“My sister is also saying I should think about my daughter’s potential relationship with her half-sibling, but I think that should be on her father to orchestrate if it’s important for him that his children bond and have a relationship. So lay it on me. AITA?”
And the general consensus was that the first wife is not an a**hole for not wanting the woman her ex-husband cheated on her with in her life any longer. However, some did suggest making sure the half-sisters stay close if her ex does not.
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“You know the saying, ‘If he’ll do it for you, he’ll do it to you?’ Well, now she does too. NTA,” one commenter wrote. “Or as granny says, “when a man marries his mistress he creates a vacancy,” another added.
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