With just days left in her pregnancy, model and advocate, Ashley Graham hosted Shay Mitchell on her podcast to talk about being a mom. Ashley’s podcast, Pretty Big Deal has attracted some pretty amazing guests and moms including Amy Schumer and Serena Williams.
The podcast is always a blast, but the latest episode with Shay is eyeopening. The two women discuss motherhood, specifically mothering in the spotlight, and mom-shaming. Being a mom is tough, but being a mom with a huge social media following has its own challenges.
Ashley said that the episode of the podcast “felt like therapy.”
Shay welcomed her first child, Atlas on October 8th and she’s already learned a lot. In the few months that she’s been on this Earth, Ashley has already experienced some mom-shaming. Weeks after giving birth, Shay was shamed for attending Drake’s birthday party.
Shay describes the experience in detail, saying, “When it all went down, and people were leaving comments like, ‘you are the world’s worst mother already, that child needs to be taken to child services’ I was like ‘wow!'”
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Shay couldn’t believe the level of criticism she received.
“It had actually been a couple of weeks after [Atlas was born], and it felt like the right time,” Shay explained. “We went out for an hour and a half and I was back, and not even do I feel like I have to explain myself, but it bothered me for the other women and new mothers out there who maybe don’t have a great support system around them to be like, ‘Don’t listen to it’ … And that’s what pissed me off.”
Ashley seemed upset but not surprised and expects the same for herself after giving birth.
In an Instagram caption about the podcast, Ashley said, “While I could not be more excited for motherhood, I can’t help but be nervous about mom-shaming. As you transition into motherhood it’s up to YOU to know when the time is right to return to work or have a night out.”
In the podcast, Ashley says, “It reminded me, ‘what are people going to say when I have my kid?’,” she told Shay after sharing that she was stunned when she heard Shay didn’t want to take maternity leave. “You have proven that it doesn’t matter what you put out, go back to work, do what you want,” Ashley said.
Shay doesn’t want the same for Ashley and says that people should praise mothers, not criticize them.
“I was like, ‘How dare you already make a new mom who is already going through a lot of doubt and guilt obviously when she leaves for the first time?” Shay told Ashley. “That should be something that is celebrated. Living your life as you did before and as you continue to do with your child.”
The podcast did convey a positive message about believing in yourself.
Ashley summed it up in an Instagram caption, “So much of the world wants us to question who we are in business, as mothers, as a person. Trust your feelings! Reach out to pregnant friends or friends going through similar things! You are not alone.”
Finishing with kind words for her guest Shay, “Absolutely loved having you on Shay!”
It’s a great podcast episode for anyone. But, if you’re a new mom, about to be a mom like Ashley, or you have experienced mom-shaming, this is a great one to take to heart.