50 dad jokes for kids

50 Dad Jokes For Kids

If your kid is a big jokester, they will love these amazingly funny dad jokes.

Scroll on for plenty of belly laughs …

50 dad jokes for kids
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“I was going to tell you all a joke about time travel. Unfortunately, none of you liked it.”

“What did the vegetables say when they got stuck in a grocery bag? Lettuce out!”

“Why did the lumberjack lose an arm? He had an axeident.”

“What do you call are car that’s out of gas? Exhausted.”

“I wanted to post a joke about a broken pencil But, then I realized there was no point.”

50 dad jokes for kids
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“Last night I made some fish tacos. Turns out they don’t like Mexican food.”

“Two windmills are standing in a wind farm. One asks, ‘What’s your favorite kind of music?’ The other says, ‘I am a big metal fan.'”

“I broke up with my girlfriend via walkie talkie She didn’t get it, no matter how many times I said it was over.”

“I had to fire my fruit delivery guy today. I hate to let the mango, but he was driving me bananas!”

“I was talking to a guy about favorite numbers… He said his was 7. What an odd fella.”

50 dad jokes for kids
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RELATED: He’s Got Jokes: 10 Funny Texts From Dads

“My smartphone just asked me if I wanted to update my contacts. Clearly, it’s a dumb phone because I wear glasses.”

“I’m mad my parents let me eat so many Rice Krispies growing up….now every time I sit down I snap, crackle, and pop.”

“Why are pigs the worst drivers? Because they hog the road!”

“Did you hear about the protesting bowling balls? They were on strike.”

“I grilled a chicken for over two hours last night… he still wouldn’t tell me why he crossed the road.”

50 dad jokes for kids
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RELATED: 150 Best Dad Jokes That Keep Things Punny

“My wife told me to take the spider out instead of killing it… So I did. We had a few drinks, pretty cool guy, said he works as a web developer.”

“Did you know there [are] more planes in the ocean [than] there [are] submarines in the sky? Well, that’s Plane to Sea.”

“The past, the present, and the future walk into a bar. It was tense!”

“What snakes do you find on cars? Windshield vipers!”

“How much space do fungi need to grow? As mushroom as possible.”

“Yesterday, I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I am okay, but I feel like I have dyed a little inside.”

“The checker at the grocery store asked me if I wanted my milk in a bag. I told her to leave it in the carton.”

“What piece on the playground is always exhausted? The tire swing.”

50 dad jokes for kids
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RELATED: Hilarious Dad Joke Memes That Are Delightfully Cheesy

“What do you call a teacher who farts really quiet? A private tutor.”

“I won a contest at the state fair for growing the biggest pickle. It was kind of a big dill.”

“How do you make an oak tree laugh? Tell acorn-y joke.”

“What’s red and bad for your teeth? A brick.”

“What is a werewolf’s favorite month? Aaawoo-gust!”

“Just got hospitalized due to a peekaboo accident. They put me in the ICU.”

“What was the gorilla’s favorite month? APE-ril.”

50 dad jokes for kids
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RELATED: 125+ Funny Knock Knock Jokes for Kids

“What did the dentist name his boat? The Tooth Ferry.”

“Two ducks are sitting in a pond One duck says ‘quack.’ The other duck says ‘Hey, I was just going to say that!'”

“How do babies take their coffee? With two hands.”

“What do you call it when you giggle while you’re drawing? A snicker-doodle!”

“Why couldn’t the superhero find anyone to challenge him? He was a Thor loser.”

“What do you call a muscular cow? Beefy.”

“What are scientists’ favorite breed of dogs? Labs.”

“What kind of shorts do clouds wear? Thunderwear.”

“Just remember, no matter where you go in life: there you are.”

50 dad jokes for kids
Image via Shutterstock

RELATED: Move Over Dad! These 150 Funny Mom Jokes Will Have You Rolling

“Someone told me I should do yoga. ‘That’s a bit of a stretch for me,’ I replied.”

“What’s a whale’s favorite sandwich? Krilled Cheese!”

“My friend lost his car. I now call him Carlos.”

“How to bees get to school? The school buzz.”

“Do you want to hear a construction joke? I can’t tell you, I’m still working on it.”

“Did I ever tell you the joke about the butter? Actually, I’d better not, you’ll just spread it around.”

“I don’t like toilet humor It’s the butt of all jokes.”

“I have a horse named Mayo… Mayo neighs.”

“Just because a pig has a pen… Doesn’t mean it can write.”

“I put maple syrup on [my] shopping list. Now it’s all sticky!”

“Dad Jokes are like farms The cornier the better.”

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