I Found Out My Ex Has Been Giving Our Kids Melatonin Before Bed, and I'm Not OK With It: Advice?

I Found Out My Ex Has Been Giving Our Kids Melatonin Before Bed, and I’m Not OK With It: Advice?

A mom writes in asking for advice about her ex and children’s father giving their kids melatonin without her permission. This mom says that she learned from her children that her ex, their father, and his girlfriend gave them dissolvable melatonin before bed while they were on a camping trip. This mom says that her kids don’t have and have never had sleeping issues, so she can’t think of why they were given melatonin. Ultimately, she says she is not ok with this and turns to the community for advice.

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A member of the community asks:

“I found out my ex gave our kids melatonin on a camping trip: Advice?”

“I found from my kids that my ex and his girlfriend have been giving my kids dissolvable melatonin before bed when they are camping. They don’t have sleeping issues, and they’ve never had sleeping issues. I’m not okay with it. Thoughts?

– Mamas Uncut Community Member

Community Advice for This Mom Who Doesn’t Like the Fact Her Ex Gave Their Kids Melatonin to Help Them Sleep

To see what advice the Mamas Uncut Facebook community has for this mom in need, read the comments of the post embedded below.

Fan QuestionI found out my ex gave our kids melatonin on a camping trip: Adcvice? I found from my kids that my ex…

Posted by Mamas Uncut on Monday, September 7, 2020

Advice Summary

I Found Out My Ex Has Been Giving Our Kids Melatonin Before Bed, and I'm Not OK With It: Advice?

The community offered this mom in need a lot of great advice. Read some of their responses below.

“I don’t think it is fair that so many people on here are saying to chill out, she has control issues, melatonin is a natural supplement blah blah blah. Bunch of judgemental Judy’s!!!! Just because you are ok with giving your child melatonin doesn’t mean others are. I think this mom is upset with the fact that the dad went ahead and made this decision without consulting with her, the other parent, first. Which is a totally normal thing to be upset about! Partners parenting as a unit can be difficult enough, let alone having to co-parent with your ex.”

“He’s their dad… it’s his right. Just because it’s not something you would do…”

“Does she consult dad if she gives the kids Advil…? Probably not. And that’s a drug, melatonin is a natural substance. Just because the kids don’t have sleeping issues at home doesn’t mean that they won’t have sleeping issues camping outside or in an unfamiliar place. The mother is overreacting, the father is allowed to make decisions just as she is.”

“Your ex is equally as much a parent as you so he has just as much right to give them natural supplements as you do. You might not be okay with it, but you don’t get to dictate how he parents when it comes to things like that.”

“It’s natural and he is their father. Do you tell him each time you may give them something?”

I’m honestly shocked by these comments!! Children should NOT be fed melatonin to force sleep! I have a 7-year-old, 4-year-old, and a 1-year-old, and I would never want to give my kids this medication to sleep… yes it may naturally occur in our bodies. But it is a proven fact that it can cause adverse effects and issues in children and adults if used for a long period of time and actually causes children to struggle more with sleeping and their bodies depend on it and stop making it naturally…

… I would be pissed right off if I found my children’s dad was so lazy that instead of taking the time to put my children to bed, read them a story, help them chill out… that he instead made them take a pill to knock them out whether the children wanted to or not… messed up and unless your child is diagnosed with a sleeping issue and doctors advise you to give your child the medication… You have no excuse except laziness!! My kids go to sleep between 730-8 and it’s because I take the time, shut off shows, no games, dimmed lights, reading stories… not just say.. meh they won’t sleep here’s a pill…”

“Considering how many times the judge had to say this, during the many years of custody hearings for my now-adult daughter, I’ll share. ‘What happens at Dad’s house (or in his care) is up to Dad… what happens at Mom’s house (or in her care) is up to Mom.’ Unless the child is being harmed, then there is nothing you can really do. Melatonin for a few nights isn’t harmful… but I would talk to their pediatrician and bring up to dad that there can be negative effects of using it too often.”

“I strongly urge you all who are ok with it to do some research on melatonin. It isn’t great to give to kids, especially long term. She has every right to have concern. No it’s not a big deal, but still doesn’t mean she’s not entitled to have an opinion about it. Jeez.”

“He is their dad and has every right to give HIS kids safe supplements.”

“I feel like I need more info but what it sounds to me is that the mom is being a helicopter mom and looks at the dad as an unfit parent and will always complain no matter what but who knows?”

“Honestly I would tell him. I’ve seen a lot of people on here say that it’s natural, there’s no problem, it just helps them sleep, but giving a kid something like melatonin can seriously mess up the way their body produces it NATURALLY and can even signal their body to not make it because they’ve got it in a synthetic form, thus causing sleep issues long term.”

Do you have any advice for this mom? Leave a comment to help another mom out!

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