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QUESTION: I am worried about how my daughter will react to finding out I am pregnant: Advice?
“My daughter is eight years old and has always said she doesn’t want a sibling. I just found out I’m pregnant, and I’m terrified she’s going to hate me. I’m happy about the pregnancy but afraid she won’t think I love her anymore. Has anyone dealt with this before, and the older child come around? I know newborns take up a lot of your time, but I’ll still make one-on-one time with her too. How do you help the older only child cope with the fact they’ll no longer be an only child?”
The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.
“Explain to her that no matter what you still love her just as much and nothing not even a new baby would change that. I was 18 when my baby sister was born I didn’t like it that much cause it felt like I was being replaced but I got over it and I still love her and would do anything for her or my brother.”
“My stepson was 8 when I got pregnant. He never wanted a sibling. He was sad when I first told him but I involved him in everything. He was the one that got to reveal the gender. I took him on a mini-vacation to a hotel with an awesome swimming pool, camping trips, etc. just the two of us. Then the baby came and he’s been good with it. I catch him playing with him. They adapt, you just gotta be there for your daughter.”
“My grandson is 9 and he was an only child, only grandchild, and an only great-grandchild. He has a 6-week old baby sister and he is in love. No jealousy at all.”
“My son was 11 when I got pregnant with my daughter he was upset at first but he is an amazing big brother. Just give her time and include her and reassure her that this baby isn’t gonna take away from your relationship.”
“I had my son when my daughter was 7, she was excited at first and that changed quickly. She did get jealous but it’s super important to make sure you make time for her. Also, try to involve your daughter in any way you can to make her feel included or helpful. It will be a new adventure for both of you, but I’m sure she will come around!”
“We told my 8 year old we were having a baby, and she stormed off. Ran to her room and slammed the bedroom door. She had a full blown melt down. A few hours later, she came out and wanted to see pics and know more. She now has a 9 month old baby sister and is WILD about her. I’ve never seen her so happy. We have a 5 year old boy, too. But, she came around full swing and says often that having a sister now is the best thing that’s ever happened to her.”
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