My 5-Year-Old’s Behavior Has Gotten Wildly Out of Control — He Steals, Lies, and Hurts His Baby Brother: Advice?

A mom writes in asking for advice about her 5-year-old son’s bad behavior. She says things are so bad she basically cannot let her son out of her sight at all. He steals things like forks, tampons, and toilet paper, and recently he broke into her desk and took important papers, a letter opener, and money. She has also caught him on the baby monitor sneaking into his 1-year-old brother’s room and throwing things at the baby in his crib. What can this mom do?

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A member of the community asks:

“My 5-year-old has had the worst behavior: Thoughts?

My 5-year-old son has gotten to the point where he can never be out of our sight. He is stealing things. Lying and purposefully hurting his baby brother. The things he steals generally are stupid things… forks, tampons, perfumes, makeup, rolls of toilet paper…

However, he took my keys and unlocked my desk last week, taking important papers, a letter opener, and money. He’s also sneaking into the kitchen at night and drinking 5 juice boxes, and any food he gets his hands on. I’ve also caught him on the baby cam going into his 1-year-old brother’s room and throwing things at him while he’s in his crib. What do I do?”

– Mamas Uncut Community Member

Community Advice for This Mom Whose 5-Year-Old Son Has the Worst Behavior

To see what advice the Mamas Uncut Facebook community has for this mom in need, read the comments of the post embedded below.

Fan QuestionMy 5-year-old has had the worst behavior: Thoughts?my 5-year-old son has gotten to the point where he…

Posted by Mamas Uncut on Thursday, April 30, 2020

Advice Summary

My 5-Year-Old's Behavior Has Gotten Wildly Out of Control — He Steals, Lies, and Hurts His Baby Brother: Advice?

The community offered this mom in need a lot of great advice. Read some of their responses below.

“You make a doctor’s appointment and mention this behaviour to the doctor, at the very least so you have it on record.”

“Talk to his doctor to get an opinion about a therapist or psychologist.”

“I can tell you from experience as I was this kid. It makes him feel good. It’s not malicious; he likes the feeling and attention he gets and thinks he’s smart. It comes from growing up too fast in his mind and needing control over something in his. Life probably brings a lot of anxiety and he needs more good attention than bad. Bad attention, he will keep doing it. Good attention, he will stop.”

“Therapy. My now 16-year-old was the same way when he was little, he’s much better now.”

“Talk to his pediatrician. Did this behavior start before or after you had the baby? It is probably just for attention. Sometimes it’s really hard for a child that young to share the spotlight.”

“You get your child some behavioral therapy and seek counseling. He is angry about something. Could be jealous of baby. Do you spend one-on-one time with him at all? He could be seeking attention.”

“When he does things what kind of punishment do you use? And do you enforce it? I say if he takes things he knows he not supposed to, start taking his favorite things as well and hide them. Hide the juices and give some as rewards. Food maybe a snack before bed time. But sounds like he can’t sleep might try melatonin to help him. And if no improvement talk to his doctor.”

“Attention seeking is actually connection seeking especially for a very young person of only 5 years old. I know it’s probably super hard, Mama, caring for a 1 year old and going through this pandemic but do you think it could be a possibility that your 5 years old needs more connection from you right now? I would also seek counseling. Counselors can be so helpful in giving you tools and tips on how to help your 5 year old behave better. You need to look beyond the behaviors and see what’s underneath it.”

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