A mom writes in asking for advice about a situation involving her son. She says her son damaged something — a computer — while staying over at someone else’s house. She wants to know if she is responsible for paying to fix the damaged computer. She believes she should not have to pay for it, because, for one thing, the adults at the house should have been watching the kids (or that they should have taken care to keep such a valuable item away from the kids), which in theory would have prevented the damage. Should she pay up?
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A member of the community asks:
“Am I responsible for replacing something my son broke at someone else’s house?”
“If someone asks my child to spend the night at their house so my child can spend time with theirs, and my child damages something on an accident at their home, should I be responsible for replacing what they damaged? (A computer in this situation).
I feel like it wouldn’t be my responsibility because the adult should have been watching the kids in the first place and keeping valuable items away from small children. Plus, they wanted my child to stay all night, I never asked.”
– Mamas Uncut Community Member
Community Advice for This Mom Who Wants to Know if It Is Her Responsibility to Pay for a Computer Her Son Damaged at Someone Else’s House
To see what advice the Mamas Uncut Facebook community has for this mom in need, read the comments of the post embedded below.
Advice Summary
The community offered this mom in need a lot of great advice. Read some of their responses below.
“I guess I’m the odd one and wouldn’t expect someone to pay for something broken under my supervision. If it’s something you don’t want broken, keep it away from the kids.”
“YOU’RE responsible for teaching your children what is acceptable to and not to touch. If you can’t handle that load, then you probably shouldn’t be allowing them to spend the night at someone else’s house, because of your shortcomings. ESPECIALLY if you’re unwilling to replace/repair/make right any damages. It’s not someone else’s job to ensure your child knows to keep their hands off of a computer! Nothing like continuing to breed entitlement into our youth.”
“Uummmmm…. but you should have taught your child how to act at someone’s house… I don’t see how breaking something is an accident, especially something like a computer? So yes you should be responsible.”
“Nope. If my two young old manages to damage something then she wasn’t being watched. That’s not my problem. They should have watched her better.”
“You’re the parent. You are responsible for your child’s actions. Teach them how to not touch things that don’t belong to them. Yes, you should pay for it.”
“I’m afraid so, you should definitely replace it or at least make the offer. Your child’s actions caused damage to someone’s belonging while being a guest in their home. Considering the circumstances, maybe an agreement to pay half would be an option. Unfortunately, accidents do happen, but we need to teach our children what is right, must take some accountability.”
“Why wouldn’t you pay for something your child broke? What is wrong with 2020 parenting. Something is seriously wrong. Yes. You replace it and apologize 10 fold and teach your kid how to respect other people’s items.”
“To be completely honest, this woman has asked an innocent question. People view incidents like this is totally different ways. I don’t feel the need to bash her for an innocent question. I would personally ask questions surrounding the breaking of the computer before I open my wallet to fix it period.”
“I personally wouldn’t pay for it. Where is the proof that it was your kid that did it? Where is the proof that the computer wasn’t already broken? When we have kids over we supervise so things don’t get broken. We put away things that valuable. If some toys broke. That’s ok they are meant to be played with. Maybe offer some money to be nice. But I wouldn’t be buying a brand new computer.”
“I’d be paying for it and my kid would be working around the house to pay me back. Yes, they should’ve been watching better but it’s also a learning lesson and a decency thing.”
“I would personally want to fix it. Accident or not, I would definitely want to take care of what was broken and teach my child that’s what people do. Accidents happen. It’s okay. But, let’s fix it for them because it’s the right thing to do.”
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